A New Day
by allie34
Summary: JC. An event in the delta quadrant places Chakotay and Janeway on a rocky path towards the future. Final chapter, chapter 10 is up. Enjoy.
1. The end of the beginning

**A New Day**

Disclaimer: Voyager belongs to Paramount. But sometimes when pets are treated badly by their owners then they have to be taken away, I don't see how this is much different.

Authors note: This first chapter is set on Voyager back in the delta quadrant, however, the story eventually moves to the alpha quadrant, and continues from some time after End Game. The two books after End Game have been ignored because they don't develop the JC idea, which is a shame, as it would have been nice for Paramount to ammend some of its mistakes.

Thanks to Kathryn Janeway (who may remane herself Queenie) for the title suggestion.

Obviously this is mainly a JC, but it does also feature some PT moments, and briefly mentions D7, but not into too much detail. Fans of Seven probably won't enjoy this too much. Mwahahahahaaa.

Enjoy.

/

Chapter one: The end of the beginning

Chakotay was sitting in the mess hall, eating breakfast, when he was ambushed by B'Elanna and Tom. He looked up and exchanged 'good mornings' with them as they sat down opposite him, with thier own trays. "Any particular reason you've decided to join me this morning?" he asked as they settled down.

"Do we need a reason to visit our favourite Commander at breakfast?" Tom said as he shoved something undescribable into his mouth.

Chakotay smiled slightly, "no, it's just you both have that... look that you get when you're up to something."

B'Elanna shrugged, "not up to something, we're just concerned about a member of this crew, and we wanted to talk to you about them."

"Oh right," Chakotay put on his serious command face, "who?"

"The Captain," Tom answered.

"The Captain?" he sounded suprised, although, come to think about it, he wasn't.

"Yes," B'Elanna went on, "she's been acting differently lately."

"Different how?" Chakotay had noticed something also, but wanted to know what they had noticed.

"I don't know," the half Klingon frowned, "I can't quite put my finger on it."

"Like the other day," Tom cut in, "when I thought I'd be clever and I raced those Guegon pilots through the nebula in the delta flyer, but ended up losing the left wing when we were caught in a plasma storm, the Captain just shrugged."

"I thought Tom was going to go back to ensign for sure," B'Elanna came in with her two pence worth.

"She just asked me how long repairs would take, and hardly flinched when I said two weeks," Tom continued, "I thought she was going to at least shout at me, or say how disappointed she was with me. But nothing, she just told me I'd better get started on the repairs."

"And remember in the last briefing, I forgot the Captain was there at all, until you turned and asked for her opinion. I swear she had no idea what you were on about, she just said, 'what ever you think is best Commander'." B'Elanna shuddered, "it's not like the Captain to leave the ship's business to what ever her first officer thinks is best."

Chakotay looked a little annoyed, "it sounds like you don't think the Captain trusts me on ship matters," he folded his arms.

"That's not what I meant Chakotay, and you know it! Usually she'll at least hear out your opinion, before she goes with it."

"True," Chakotay rubbed his chin thoughtfully; he too had thought it odd at the time.

"Don't even get me started on the atmosphere on the bridge at the moment," Tom started.

"Then don't," he was cut off by his superior officer who stood up from the table, his breakfast only half eaten. "My shift's about to start, I'll think about what the two of you have just said."

"Have you and the Captain had an argument?" B'lanna asked the obvious question.

He looked sharply at his old friend, "no," he said firmly, "I'll see you both later."

Before either of them could say anything else, the Commander was heading out of the mess hall. "They've fallen out about something," Tom returned to his breakfast, not quite sure what was worse, Telaxian or Bolian cuisine.

/

The Captain sat in her reading room with a stack of reports on the coffee table in front of her, but she wasn't reading any of them. Her mug of coffee sat forgotten and cold on the table, as she stared out of the port hole to her side, and watched as the blur of lights passed by her. Without buzzing to gain permission for entry, Chakotay entered through her ready room doors. She didn't even turn around to face him.

"What's this about?" he folded his arms, and looked over at her with grave concern.

She looked slowly across at him. Her hair was perfect, her makeup- perfect, her uniform- creasless but her face pained, and he didn't know why. She let out a sigh, the first sign that she was actually breathing and finally met his eyes, "if you could change one thing in your life, one thing from your past, what would it be?"

Chakotay frowned and crossed his arms, but thought for a moment, "I don't think I'd change anything," she looked suprised, "otherwise I wouldn't be here, in your ready room right now. Everything has happened for a reason, and I'm happy with what it has lead to." He smiled sweetly, "why do you ask?"

She looked away from him, and returned her gaze to the window. "No reason."

He let his arms drop to his sides, and went over to her, to sit beside her, she didn't seem to notice that he had moved at all. "What would you change?"

Kathryn seemed a little shocked when she realised that Chakotay had moved to sit beside her, but quickly recovered and looked over at him. "Lots of things," she replied, "too many things."

"Let me guess," Chakotay said with a soft smile, relaxing back a little, and resting his arm on the sofa, "destroying the array would have been one of those things you would have changed?"

She thought for a moment, "no, if I went back and did my life over again, I wouldn't have taken Voyager."

The answer suprised him, "a different ship?"

She shook her head, "I would have stayed a science officer, paid less attention to my career, and more attention to my life."

Finally Chakotay felt like he was getting somewhere. "Started a familly?"

He thought she would retreat at that point, tell him she had work to do, and ask to be left alone. But she nodded. "Probably."

"It's not too late now you know?" he said sincerly.

She looked at him, unconvinced, "on a starship, as the Captain, thousands of light years from our home?" she came close to laughing, but the humour never even made it to her lips, "no," she shook her head, "I gave up on all that when I destroyed the array." Finally a smile did make its way to her lips, but it wasn't her radient smile, it was ironic and almost fake, "I think Mark knew that a familly was out of the question the moment I was promoted to Captain."

"You both wanted a familly?" Chakotay asked softly.

Kathryn shrugged, "he said he was happy either way. And I think he would have been, for a while."

There was a moments silence between them, before Chakotay broke it, "dinner tonight?"

"I'm not in the mood," she gave her excuse.

"My place, I'll cook," he shot her his best smile.

She grinned, although it didn't quite make it to her eyes, but nodded, "19:00?"

"We'll talk about this later, okay?" he rested a hand on her shoulder as he stood.

She shook her head, "no, let's talk about something different; I need a distraction."

/

He tried his best to keep her distracted, he even made her laugh a few times, but her grim expression always returned. The odd silence and eerie calm always returned and washed over her. He brought out her desert, strawberry cheese cake, and sliced apple for himself. He handed the plate to her, and sat down beside her on the sofa.

After several moments, he noticed that she hadn't touched her desert, and looked up at her, confused. "Don't you like it?" he asked worriedly.

She looked up at him, suprised, almost as if she had forgotten that he was there at all. "No, it's just," her voice sounded throatier than usual, as if she was struggling to speak. She put down the plate on the coffee table, "I'm just not hungry, sorry," she appologised.

"Coffee?" he asked.

She nodded absently, so he stood up and went over to the replicater. He returned with two mugs, but something about her made him put them down on the table instead of handing her one. Her breathing was a little ragged, and she was looking down at the floor, he sat down beside her again, and reached out to lift her chin up. He saw her eyes glisten with unshed tears, and as their eyes met and locked, a lone tear escaped and ran down the side of her face.

It was the first time he had seen the Captain cry. Sure, he'd seen her come close to shedding a tear here and there, but to actually watch them fall down her face was something new. Not a good thing, he didn't enjoy seeing her cry, but it was the first time that she'd let him see her let her self go in such a way, and so he decided it wasn't a bad thing either.

He had wanted to take her into his arms, to kiss the top of her head and whisper soothing words, but he knew that that was crossing the barrier, and so placed a hand on her upper arm, and gently caressed it. In the end it was Kathryn that closed the gap between them, that leant forward, wrapping her arms around his waist, as she rested her head on his shoulder. He responded carefully, taking his arms around her body, and gently drawing circles on her back.

She didn't cry hard, but enough to make him worried. She quickly calmed down, and just leant against him, leaving him to wonder what was wrong.

Chakotay was lost so deeply in thought that he hardly noticed it at first. Kathryn had shifted a little in his arms, one of her hands had come up from around his waist and was rested lightly, almost teasingly on his shoulder. He almost thought he had imagined it, then she did it again; placed a soft kiss on his neck, and then on his shoulder, that felt warm and welcome, even through his uniform. She returned her attention to his neck, his collar bone, his jaw line, placing small kisses, that although barely touched his skin, sent shivers down his spine.

The hand that was still on his waist started to move, it followed the edge of his trousers, then slipped under the back of his shirt. Skin to skin. Then her hand on his shoulder moved to his neck, then cupped the side of his face, turned his head slightly, and suddenly they were making eye contact. She met his eyes, and watched them as she placed a kiss torturingly close to his lips. She smiled at his suprise, and ran a finger along his lower lip.

Pulling together all the strength that he had, he reached up and grapped her hand, pulling it down from his face. He was about to remove her other hand, but her lips were on his before he had time. He felt himself respond to her touch, he tried not to, he knew he shouldn't, but knew he would. He thought about stopping her, but he never got passed the thought, in truth, he didn't want to stop her.

All his self control went as he felt her hand idly make its way up his inner thigh. In one swift movement he'd pulled her onto his lap, and moved his hands to unzip the top of her uniform. She let him, busy with starting to remove his uniform. Somehow they removed their jackets without parting theirs lips, and he felt suddenly abandoned when Kathryn pulled away from him and climbed off his legs. He was worried for a moment that she'd changed her mind, but the moment didn't last long, she stood in front of him, her eyes still locked with his.

Slowly, and teasingly she kicked off her boots, as he did his, their eyes never parting. It was almost a strip tease, she pulled her shirt over her head, the StarFleet grey vest the only thing left covering her bra. He smiled as she started to pull it up, her skin beneath it just starting to show, before she let it drop. He frowned, but she just leant her head to one side, "want to lend me a hand?" she asked in a seductive voice, that he found he was unable to refuse.

He stood and wrapped his arms loosely around her waist, kissing her softly and passionately on the lips. Then he helped her out with the rest of her clothing.

/

"Last night," Chakotay stood by the door of the Captain's ready room, "what was it about?"

"Which part?" she asked coyly, although sounding disinterested, and not even bothering to look up from the report she was reading.

He felt hurt; he had given her everything he was that night, and she had climbed out of his bed, dressed, and left his quarters, leaving him to wake alone, without a goodbye or a word of explanation, for anything.

"The part where you cried, where you kissed me, then when we..." he trailed off, he wasn't sure it was the same experience for her that it had been for him, but he decided to continue when he saw her put down her padd, cross her arms, and look blankly and fiercly across at him. "And then when we made love," he finished.

Her lips parted to say something, then she seemed to change her mind and closed them. It was unlike Kathryn to be lost for words, but it was also unlike her to cry his name in his bed.

She stood from where she sat and made her way over to her favourite port hole. It always seemed to help her to clear her mind, and figure out exactly what she wanted to say. "I," she took in a deep breath, "I recieved some bad news earlier this week, from Earth. For the first time in a while I was reminded what I was missing out on, being here on Voyager."

She smiled to herself, "sometimes I can fool myself, that it's better here; I don't have to listen to StarFleet Admirals tell me what to do. I'm closer to my crew than most Captains can say they are. And I know if I hadn't have destroyed that array, all my Maquis crew would be in jail, that Tom and B'Elanna wouldn't be happilly married and expecting a baby, that I wouldn't have you as my best friend."

Kathryn stopped, her hands behind her back like a perfect StarFleet officer, and she turned around to face him. "Yesterday that wasn't enough for me, the day before it wasn't either, or the day before that. If I'm honest with you, and if I'm honest with myself, I was starting to think that I was the only one not any better off for my decision. I realised the reason why that was, is because I'm the Captain, I'm the only one that's not allowed to move on; to be happy."

"You really believe that?" Chakotay was still stood near to the door, but neither seemed to feel the distance between them.

"Last night I wasn't the Captain, I was the woman that you wanted me to be, and for a time I could forget about everything I was missing out on here, because for that moment, you were all I needed."

"What are you trying to say?" he sounded worried, but almost expected it.

She started to close the gap between them, part of her thinking that it would be easier that way; less painful. "I can only give you a night here and there and a divided friendship; divided because this ship and crew must always come before it. That would be enough for me. But I know it wouldn't be enough for you."

"Anything more than friendship that you have to offer me would be more than enough," he protested.

Kathryn placed a hand on his chest and met his eyes. "Sex isn't more than friendship, if anything it lessens it, unless it is part of a committed and loving relationship, and I can't give you that." She let out a sigh, "we're better off as friends, than two people who sleep together to escape reality."

"So you want to forget that last night ever happened?" He reached out and cupped her cheek with his hand.

She shook her head and covered his hand with her own, "no, I just don't want it to undermine our friendship."

Chakotay let out a long breath, for some reason he didn't feel as hurt as when he had entered her ready room, but it still pained him to hear what she was saying. "Do you think if we weren't on Voyager it would be different?" he had to know.

She smiled up at him, "everyday," she replied.

"Easier maybe?"

"Nope, but better."

She pulled him down to her for one final kiss, that melted on his lips, and accepting that it couldn't be any other way, he left her ready room, prepared to move on with their friendship.

End of chapter one.


	2. Table manners

Disclaimer: Voyager belongs to paramount.

Author's note: thanks to all those that have reviewed so far, and please keep reading and reviewing. Constructive critism would also be good, I want to know how realistic the characters are, I probably won't go back and change anything, but it would help me for future stories. Thanks!

/

Chapter two: Table manners.

Four months later.

Kathryn sat out on the patio at her home in Indianna reading a book. Although she liked the sun, for some reason it didn't get on with her skin, and so she sat in the shade provided by the house behind her. She heard the back door open and close, and someone walk across the tiles towards the table. It was Phoebe.

"You're really not going to tell me are you?" she sat down and folded her arms, in some form of sulk.

Her sister smiled secretly and turned the page to the book she was reading, "nope," she replied.

There was an annoyed sigh from the younger of the two, "I could make a good guess," she started.

"You'd be wrong," Kathryn placed her book mark in between the pages, and placed in on the table in front of her.

"No, you'd just deny it if I got it right," Phoebe pointed out the obvious truth.

"Probably," there was no point in denying that fact.

The two sisters sat in silence for a few more moments, as Kathryn looked out at the expanse of the garden, and her sister sat and watched her. "Human?"

Kathryn looked over at her younger sibling, to see if she was being serious. She was. That was good, she decided, it meant that she really didn't have a clue. "I'm not going to help you narrow down the possibilities of who the father could be."

"I'll find out soon enough anyway," she replied defiantly. "Does Leuitenant Paris know?"

She laughed at that one, her sister was incredulous. "You can't catch me out that way," she said as she sobered, "But yes, the Paris familly do know. It's no secret that I'm pregnant."

"So if that father knows, then why isn't he here," Phoebe was annoyed on her sister's behalf, although Kathryn seemed less than concerned.

"I never said he knew, I just said that it's not a secret."

"Well, I've narrowed it down to sixty, only about ten of which I think are realistic," Phoebe thought she might as well inform her sister on her detective progress.

"That few eh?" Kathryn raised an eyebrow and smiled teasingly across at her sister, spirits she knew she missed all the sister stuff on Voyager.

She ran a hand through her blonde hair and let out an exasperated sigh. "I know it's definately not that Maquis Captain."

Kathryn looked confused, "why not?"

"He's not your type," Phoebe replied as matter of factly.

"You don't know what my type is," she declared, looking up at the sky, through the edge of the leaves of a near by tree.

"Kathryn, I think I've met enough of your boyfriends to hazard a good guess," she smiled to herself, "he's usually tall; always taller than you. Deep eyes, no inbetweens, crisp blue or dark brown. Hair, hmm," she said thoughtfully, "well, he usually has plenty of it. Broad shoulders. Muscles aren't essential, but you tend to keep the fit ones for longer. Ruggedly hansome, no pampered boy-men. Personality; well, firstly they have to be fearless to date you in the first place," both women laughed, "but not so much so that they dominate. Charming. Intelligent. Considerate. Caring. Loving. Passionate. Amazing in bed..."

"How does that come under personality?" Kathryn cut her sister off.

"It doesn't," Phoebe replied innocently, "I've changed to another topic."

"Well change to another one."

"That was my last one," she admitted, "so, how close was I?"

"You described him," Kathryn gave up and lay back against her chair.

Phoebe frowned, "who? that Commander, or the father?"

She looked over guiltily at her sister, "both," she couldn't be bothered to keep it from her sister any longer. Half the Voyager crew and newspapers had guessed.

Her sister just laughed, "jeez Kathryn, if Chakotay and the father are both so perfect they might as well be the same person."

At that Kathryn just rolled her eyes, "they are the same person Phebes," she said a little tiredly.

There was a moment's silence, before her sister shouted out, "WHAT!?"

/

She had been back in the Alpha quadrant for two months. Two months since they travelled through the borg hub, since her older self had her showdown with the borg queen. Since Admiral Paris had hailed Voyager and welcomed her home.

They were all sat around the dinner table; herself, her sister, her sister's husband, and her mother.

Phoebe kept her eyes closely on her sister, who was being careful to avoid looking in her direction. "So Kathryn," she broke the comfortable silence, "being a Captain must be like dealing with food."

She looked confused, "I really don't see how."

"Well," she took a deep breath, "when you go to the market, you always have to pick your food carefully, you're going to eat it later, and you don't want it to make you ill, so you only chose the best. Like when you're chosing your crew, you know that you're going to have to rely on them some day to save your life, and so you have to pick out the most experienced and reliable." Kathryn had a feeling she wasn't going to like where her sister was going, her feeling was right.

"And then, like certain foods need to be stored, prepared and eaten in certain ways, each member of your crew is individual, and their needs need to be catered for in different ways." She gave her sister a knowing look, "and then, when your food is on your plate, everyone knows you shouldn't play with it, just like you shouldn't play with your junior officers."

Gretchen and Paul almost spat out their dinners at Phoebe's words, but Kathryn looked cooly across at her sister. She opened her mouth to retort, she had the perfect one lined up, but changed her mind at the last moment, deciding that two months was too soon to be falling out with her younger sister. So she picked up her fork and continued eating, not giving Phoebe the satisfaction of a full response.

/

Later that night whilst Kathryn was sat out on one of the swings at the bottom of the garden. She heard someone come up towards her, but assuming that it was either her mum or sister she didn't bother to look up. She was suprised when she looked over to see Paul standing hesitantly close by. She smiled pleasently across at him. "You want to be alone, or can I sit and join you?"

Kathryn just shrugged, "I've been out here alone for about half an hour now."

He smiled and sat down on the swing next to hers. "I asked Phebe what she meant earlier at dinner, and she told me that Commander Chakotay was the father."

"She never was good at keeping secrets," Kathryn admitted.

"It's not like you to be careless," he pointed out.

She had to shoot him a smile for that, "I wasn't careless, reckless maybe."

He laughed at that, tilting his head back, "that's the Kathryn Janeway I remember." Their laughter subsided and he turned to face her, "you know I had this massive crush on you when we first met."

"I know," she admitted.

"That obvious was I?"

"Ashley told me."

"Bitch!" Paul cursed their old friend, but shook his head, "anyway, obviously when I met Phoebe it was like 'Kathryn who?', let's face it, you were too much for me, and the moment I saw your sister I knew that she was perfect for me."

Kathryn sighed, "is there a point to any of this?"

Paul nodded, "yep," he replied, "when you and Chakotay were attending all those press conferences those first two weeks you were actually back on Earth, I saw the way he looked at you, there's not doubt that he thinks your perfect for him."

She shrugged, "I turned him down one too many times Paul, that's the reason why he left, and the reason why I didn't try to stop him."

"Why didn't you tell him?"

"He would have stayed."

Paul shook his head in disbelief, "that's not what you wanted?"

"I want him to be happy," she replied, "he's got... lots of unfinished business, lots of ghosts to lay to rest, he's got his entire life to figure out, and I didn't want to get in the way."

"Don't you think he should at least be given the choice whether or not he wants to father your child?" he asked evenly.

Grabbing the chains of the swing she leant back, her weight pulling on her extended arms. "I've thought this through Paul, I'm a big girl now, I know what I'm doing."

"Okay, I just think if it was me that I'd prefer to know and make my own choice."

She didn't respond to that.

/

A month later.

Chakotay lay on the grass beside Sekaya. The hot summer sun was toned down by a cool breeze and gentle shade from the trees. They had just been swimming in the lake, and were allowing the water to evaporate off their skins. "Did you know you haven't stopped talking about Voyager since you got here?" she asked.

He turned his head to face her and smiled, "so? I spent seven long years there, they're some of my favourite memories."

"So you're only sharing your favourite memories with me?" She said thoughtfully, "so that must mean this Captain Janeway is one of your favourite people."

"Most of the time," he replied, he knew she was going to tease it out of him sooner or later, so decided it might as well be sooner.

"No fun!" she complained, "you're not even trying to be coy!"

He chuckled.

She leaned onto her side, and looked curiously over at her older brother, "so how close were the two of you?"

"We're very good friends," he replied, almost a little too quickly to convince her.

"Nothing more?" a grin had made its way on to her face.

"Yes," he sat up, running a hand through his near to dry hair, "we're best friends."

This time she laughed, "my brother doesn't do best friends with women."

He didn't try to argue, he knew he would lose. So he lay back on his folded arms, and looked up at the cloudless sky, through the leaves of the trees.

"Hmm," Sekaya said thoughtfully, her eyes still intent on Chakotay, "I believe it's called Stockholm syndrome."

Chakotay turned his head and raised an eyebrow.

"I think you're in love with your captor," she went on teasingly.

His playful smile dropped and he sat up, running his hand through his almost dry hair. "She wasn't my captor."

"What ever way you want to look at it," she replied evenly. He shot her a glare and stood up. "Okay, I'm sorry Chakotay, I didn't mean to upset you," she said as she came to her feet also.

There was a moments silence as he just looked out at the lake before him, then he turned to her, "you're right about one thing Sekaya, I did find myself falling in love with her on that ship."

"What about now?" her voice was deep and had lost its earlier light tone and jovility.

He shrugged, "my feelings haven't changed, but after years of rejection I'm not going to continue to run after her, if she wants me, she's going to have to come and get me." He turned round to her and beamed widely, "race you to the lake."

Before she could accept the challenge he ran off, leaving her to try and catch up.

/

End of chapter two.


	3. Starting again

Disclaimer: Paramount created it, then they came up with the C7 idea (shivers at the thought), I'm just trying to put it right.

Authors note: You think this is taking a long time to update? I haven't updated my other story Betrayal for about two months (computer crashed, long story, waiting to get all the data off it, will be up dated within the next few week... hopefully).

Chapter three: Starting again.

Two weeks later.

Chakotay walked through the village to a small log building near the centre. He walked up the few steps that there were, across the wooden decking and through the door. The lady behind the desk smiled pleasently at him, recognising him from the various village parties and gatherings. He approached her, "I was told that the post arrived yesterday, and was wondering if there was any for me."

"Chakotay isn't it?" she asked as she turned to the various pidgeon holes behind her.

"Yes," he smiled; almost everyone in the village knew him or of him. There had been no large announcement, but his sister was well known, being the best doctor within the area, and as she visited patients, she would brag about his travels in the delta quadrant, and before long, the entire village knew him by name.

He was quite suprised when he was handed four letters, as he hadn't told anyone of his plans to visit his sister, but, it seemed that some of the Voyager crew had found out, or guessed.

The first letter, annoyingly, was from StarFleet command, asking whether or not he intended to keep his commision or resign it. He put that letter to one side, deciding that he would worry about that later. The second letter was from some jounalist requesting an interview. That letter went on a fire that someone was holding at the front of their house.

As he approached his sister's house he noticed that he had a letter from Tom and B'Elanna. He smiled to himself, wondering how they'd figured out how to find him, but shrugged the thoughts aside, sat down on the sofa and read it.

_Hey Chakotay, it's me B'Elanna, thanks for letting me know you were leaving! Miral's fine, thanks for asking, in the letter that you never sent me. Tom's being Tom, and oh, says to say 'hi'._

_We stayed at Tom's parents for a while, who are, by the way, not horrible like Tom made out they were! They've made me feel really welcome, and they absolutely adore Miral (she's going to be spoilt by them). But we've taken up the offer of an appartment from StarFleet, and we're currently living in San Francisco._

_Most of the crew are still on Earth, even four months after we landed, which is good because we still get to see them reguarly. Maybe a little too often, if you know what I mean, not a day passes by without someone or other visiting, but I'd rather see them too often than not enough. I'd rather see you too often than not enough._

_The Doctor's sulking right now, because he's not getting all the attention and fuss that he expected, and still refuses to stay with Zimmerman, out of some weird pride thing he has going. Tom thinks that he thinks going there will be admitting some sort of defeat. It would, but don't tell him that I said that._

_I don't suppose that you want to know Seven's onto her sixth boyfriend since we got back, apparently the previous five were inefficient, (meaning that they didn't find the depths of particl physics, perfection and Borg ideals interesting). _Chakotay smiled to himself. _Maybe she should just marry the Doctor, oh no, I take that back, can you imagine having dinner with the two of them as a couple?_

_Anyway, Harry's just accepted a post aboard the Pioneer, he leaves in two weeks, so if you want to see him off you'd better leave by next Friday to get to Earth in time._

_Naomi is getting on great with her dad, but probably boring him with stories of 'this one time when Neelix...', but you can't blame her, Neelix was a large part of her life. She's the most popular girl at her school, being part of the Voyager clan and everything, not to mention the brightest student, I would like to take some credit for that!_

_The Captain or Admiral Janeway, well, she wants us to call her Kathryn now, but it's hard to get out of a seven year old habit. She's doing fine as well, I think she was staying with her mother and sister for the first two months back, but StarFleet's given her a plush appartment in the city, and she's been living there for a few months now. I think Miral's going to love having a new playmate. _Chakotay raised an eyebrow.

_Oh, and going back to Miral. Me and Tom have been making friends with other parents within StarFleet, and already it's looking like she's going to have a large repetour of friends her own age, and it's great talking to some more experienced parents, and getting their advice, and also sharing problems with first timers like ourselves._

_I would write more, but I think I'd bore you. Come back soon before I come there and drag you back!_

_Lots of love,_

_B'Elanna._

Chakotay folded the letter back up with a smile, it was good to hear from one of his oldest and closest friends. He lifted up the last letter. It was in a large brown envelope, and looked proffessional. There was no address on the back, but he proceeded to open it anyway. He removed the pieces of paper, and read the top one.

_Commander Chakotay, _

_Dorvan, _

_Sector 19.237_

_RE: information on foetal progress_

_I am glad to inform you that you are to expect a healthy baby on star date 55.962, but the birth could be premature if the mother's consumption of coffee does not desist. However, I am not too concerned with the current levels of caffeine within the blood, and they should pose no long term threat as long as they are closely monitored. _

_The mother has not requested a specification of sex, but if you would like to be informed then please feel free to write back and ask me for it, or anything else that you feel you should know. Although you are not expected to attend the birth, if the situation were to change then I would like to be kept informed, to ensure that the appropriate proceedures are followed through correctly._

_I would also like your permission to access your medical files, or to be notified if you have any medical conditions, allergies, genetic disorders etc that may effect your child. As I have said, I have no worries currently, but it is always best to be prepared, and often (if it is at all necessary) it is best to operate sooner rather than later. I have attached some scans of the foetus, and basic relevant medical information, if you should require more, please to not hesitate to write._

_Yours truthfully,_

_Doctor P J Kline_

Fingers trembling, so far having already done the maths in his head, he turned the page to see a long list of medical data, most of which meant nothing to him. The following three pages were pictures of the foetus at various stages and angles. He placed the papers back into the envelope and chucked it on the sofa beside him. This was not happening to him. It was probably just a mix up. Kathryn would have told him. Wouldn't she?

Then, like someone winding him in the stomach, B'Elanna's words came back to him, 'Miral's going to love having a new playmate'.

Before he could allow himself to dwell on it any longer, he ran to his room and packed a bag.

His sister was just coming through the door to the house when she saw Chakotay emerge from his bedroom. "Hey big brother," she smiled over at him, then noticed the bag slung over his shoulder, and her smile dropped, "you going somewhere?"

He looked suprised to see her. He was suprised to see her. In his rush he'd completely forgotten about her, realisation struck him, that he would have forgotton to say goodbye to her, had she not just walked through the front door. "I'm sorry," he made his way over to the sofa, and picked up the letters that he'd left there, "I need to go back."

"Where?"

"To Earth," he replied, making his way over to Sekaya.

"Oh," she sounded disappointed, "you going to tell me why?"

Chakotay smiled softly and rested a hand on her shoulder, "I'll tell you when I get there," he replied and kissed her on the forehead, "the transport leaves in ten minutes, and I don't want to wait for two days to catch the next. I'll see you later okay?"

She smiled, "you'd better think up a good reason for leaving me while you're on your way over there."

He nodded, and smiled, "bye," he shouted over his shoulder as he ran out of the front door.

"Bye," she shouted back, rolling her eyes, brothers!

A few days later.

Kathryn just stood at the door in shock, as the one man that she least expected to see at her appartment, at half past eleven at night, stood at her door, his eyes intent on her. Chakotay moved forward and placed a hand on her waist, but she retreated, she didn't know why. He looked hurt and suprised at her movement, but accepted it and took a step back, "I'm sorry," he managed to choke the words out, in a quiet voice. His eyes finally moved from appreciating her altered appearance, and met her sharp blue eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?" his voice sounded pained and tired.

Absentmindedly, she placed a hand on her swollen belly, "I didn't want you to feel pressured to make any decisions."

"Like what?!" he sounded angry, "like whether or not I wanted to be part my child's life?"

"Maybe you should come in, so we can discuss this properly," she suggested.

He ran a hand through his hair, and stepped further inside. "Spirits Kathryn, you of all people should have known I would want to be this baby's father."

Sighing, she went over to the door, and closed it behind Chakotay, this was going to be a long talk, and she wasn't going to stand at the entrance to her appartment for the duration of it. "Maybe that's part of why I didn't tell you," she said as she passed back by him and headed down the hallway towards the lounge.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked as he followed.

"It's supposed to mean," she disappeared through a door to one side, "that I don't want our baby to grow up with a father with regrets, I wanted you to chose your own life, not for someone else to chose it for you." She sat down heavily on one of the sofas.

Chakotay seated himself opposite her, "and you never thought that I might regret not being part of this?"

She lay back into the sofa, taking a few calming breaths to help her recover from the shock of seeing him. Although it was late, she hadn't been asleep, some habits were hard to change, and staying up late doing work was one of them.

A thought occured to him, "unless you just didn't want me."

Her head bolted up, and she looked fiercly across at him, "Chakotay, I was going to tell you, then I found out about Seven, and before I could get passed that, you up and left. You didn't say bye or mention to anyone where you were going, you just went." She sighed, "I thought about tracking you down, but I realised that maybe it was for the best, you obviously needed time alone, and I wasn't about to deprive you of that."

"What does Seven have to do with anything?" he was furious.

"You married her in an alternate timeline," Kathryn replied through clenched teeth, not too pleased at his agressive tone.

Chakotay leant forwards and ran his hands through his dark hair in frustration, "we can't know what the circumstances were there," he shot back, "maybe you miscarried, or, maybe abortioned," he stood up suddenly, "this is such a mess!"

He moved away from her and towards the window, purposefully keeping his back away from her. There was a long and painful silence between them, that seemed to last an eternity. From the reflection in the glass he watched as she stood from the sofa, a little less graceful than her usual movements, and made her way over to him. Coming up from behind him, she slipped her arms around his waist, and rested her head against his shoulder blade.

For a moment he was too scared to move, too scared that any movement would cause her to break away from him. So slowly, he reached down and covered one of the hands on his waist with one of his own hands. "Maybe we should pay more attention to what happens now," he could feel her warm breath against the back of his neck, "rather than how and why we got here."

"You know where I stand on this," he replied, his voice an eerie calm compared to his earlier outrage.

"No," she pulled away, "I don't."

Chakotay turned around, confused, "I said that I wanted to be this baby's father."

"How?" she'd taken a step back, and broken their physical connection, "do you want to play happy families and raise our child that way? Do you want us to remain friends; to continue dating other people, with the baby going between us constantly? Do you want to be the weekend dad, that eventually loses interest? Or do you just want to walk out of that door, and go back to how it was before, me not knowing where you were, and you not knowing anything about this baby?"

There was a pause from the man infront of her, he'd just assumed that he would turn up at her door, and everything would work itself out. He'd never considered that there would be choices to be made. "Do you love me?"

She frowned, simple enough question. There was a long beat of complete silence. Did she? The pause was too much for him, he let out a long shaky breath, "maybe we should just try the friendship thing," he suggested, knowing that it was going to be the hardest of the options for him, but he also knew he couldn't leave his child, or force her into something that she didn't want.

He moved passed her, with the intention of letting himself out of her appartment, "you haven't let me answer," he stopped in his tracks at her words.

Slowly, he turned around, finally daring to again meet her eyes. "I love you," she replied simply, "I'm just scared that it won't be enough."

His shoulders dropped with relief, and he suddenly became aware of his rapid pulse. A small smile finally made its way to his lips, "it's a good start," he said as he closed the gap between them, then paused briefly before slowly wrapping his arms around her. She responded by softening into the embrace, and he finally found the confidence to kiss the top of her head as she took her arms around his waist.

After some minutes of them just standing there like that, Chakotay felt Kathryn reach for his hand, he didn't understand, but allowed her to take his hand and place it on her stomach. The frown on his face lasted a moment longer, before he felt movement, his eyes widened and met with Kathryn's, she smiled reasuringly. His suprised expression quickly flickered to a smile as he felt more movement. "I can feel the baby kicking," he stated the obvious, as she just smiled amusedly at his pleasently suprised expression. "It doesn't hurt does it?" he asked, suddenly concerned.

Kathryn shook her head, "not that I notice, sometimes it keeps me awake though."

With a sudden pang of guilt, he suddenly remembered how late it was, and for a moment worried that he may have woken her, before he noticed she was still half dressed in her Admiral's uniform, minus the grey jacket. "Was the baby keeping you awake before I came?" he asked suspiciously.

She grinned guiltily, "I just had a lot of work, but I don't think I'll get too much sleep once you've gone, seeing as the baby's just started up kicking again."

"How long has the baby been kicking?" suddenly he wanted desperately to catch up on everything that he'd already missed.

"Umm, just under a month," she replied, moving his hand to a slightly different position. He smiled to himself, as he felt a very distinct kick beneath his palm. "So where are you staying?"

Chakotay frowned, good question, "nowhere. I got off the transport, and came straight here."

"From where?"

"From Dorvan," he replied, then the thought occured to him that she didn't have a clue where he'd been for the past four months. "I've just spent the past two months with my sister and her family, and before that, I spent about six weeks visiting maquis memorial sites, laid a few ghosts to rest caught up with a few old friends, and basically just tried to figure out what I'm going to do next."

"And what did you decide?"

He shrugged, "I want to be with you."

She raised an eyebrow, "and you decided that before or after you found out I was pregnant?"

"Before," he smiled, pulling her towards him in another embrace, "but before I found out about this, I thought I'd be stubborn and wait for you to come to me."

Kathryn smiled against his shoulder, and relished in the familiar comfort of his arms. "Maybe you should stay here tonight," she suggested, as she pulled back a little. He gave her a look which questioned if she was sure. "In the spare room of course," she quickly ammended.

He smiled, "if it's not too much trouble."

Telling him that it wasn't, they both started to get ready for bed. In their seperate bedrooms.

End of chapter three


	4. The MSHS

Disclaimer: Voyager and all it's characters belong to Paramount (but not by choice).

Author's note: I too have just been on holiday, and understand the frustration of chapter posting. But it's the only way to get chapter by chapter reviews, and to know if one chapter is shitter that the other. So, before you wet yourself or something, here's the fourth.

Chapter four: The MSHS

Tom raised a glass to the group of people in his house, "here's to six months in the alpha quadrant," he smiled around at everyone. His toast was soon followed by the sound of glass clashing against glass, and then the murmur of voices continued.

Chakotay came up behind B'Elanna, "any one would think Tom had alteria motives for this house warming party," he said in a low voice.

She turned round and smiled, "well, you know Tom, any excuse for a party."

"True," he grinned.

"So do you know when Kathryn is expected back from Cardassia?" she changed the subject.

Her former Commander shrugged, "the mission was last minute, she said that she'd tell me when she's due back as soon as she knows."

"Talking of due dates," B'Elanna said thoughtfully, "if she's not back soon, your baby could be born in the enemy's territory."

Chakotay had considered this already, and his friend reminding him didn't help. "I know," he sighed, "but the baby's not due for another month, and she has assured me that she won't be any longer than a week." He paused, "maybe I should have gone with her."

She shrugged, "maybe, but I don't think you killing any arrogent Cardassian 'diplomats' while you were there, would have really helped the situation."

He nodded, "but of all the Admirals- why Kathryn?"

It was a question that most people were asking. Kathryn was eight months pregnant, and was no longer drinking coffee, making her very difficuilt to be around at times. Why StarFleet wanted her of all people to deal with the new Cardassian government was a mystery to most people. Sure, she was great at negotiating and dealing with the arrogent and stuck up beuracracy, (StarFleet and Cardassian alike) but she wasn't the only Admiral that was.

B'Elanna shrugged, "Tom's dad says that it's probably got something to do with her being the only 'neutral' Admiral in StarFleet; apparently not being here for the war means that the Cardassians are more likely to trust and speak with her."

Chakotay hadn't thought of it like that, and nodded slowly, "maybe."

His friend shrugged, "hopefully she'll tell us everything when she gets back."

He winced, "unlikely, but mircles do happen."

Before either of them could say anything else, B'Elanna was distracted by the sound of Miral crying. She appologised and went to help Tom with their infant daughter. Chakotay made his way over to the drinks table, and poured himself another glass of wine.

"Chakotay," he turned round sharply at the voice, "it's good to see you again."

"Seven," he looked more than a little awkward, after having successfully avoided her for the entire evening, "it's good to see you too."

She reached for a glass of juice, "I wish to congradulate you on your impending fatherhood," she said pleasently.

Chakotay felt his gut twist into an uncomforatable position, but smiled anyway. "Thank you," he looked around the crowded room, "do you mind if we speak somewhere a little less crowded?"

Seven could half guess what about, and noticing that her date was happily chatting away to Michael Ayala she nodded. He led her into the garden, where only a few other people had ventured that evening. Finding a quiet and secluded spot by one of the trees, he decided it was now or never to talk with her.

"You've probably worked out that mine and Kathryn's child was not concieved after we returned to Earth," he said as calmly as he could.

The former drone nodded, "it was not that hard to figure out," she replied.

"You should know that it was before you and I started dating," he said quickly, "I didn't even find out that Kathryn was pregnant until just under two months ago, and I never intended to hurt you in anyway."

She looked genuinly confused. "I don't think that I understand why I might be hurt by this."

'Shit' Chakotay cursed to himself, 'she didn't have any idea you idiot, you didn't have to tell her anything!'. He nodded slowly, "I thought that you might be upset to think that I may have been dating you, whilst still having feelings for Kathryn," he tried his best to explain, but she still didn't seem to get it.

"If you still had feelings for the Captain, then why did you agree to go out with me in the first place?" her voice was calm and steady.

"I'm not sure," he confessed, "the Captain had just decided that a relationship between us would not be appropriate for her. I was hurt and upset, and I guess when you asked me out, I saw a way of getting back at her," he said thoughtfully, "by moving on," he added as an after thought, to try and weaken the blow.

"I still don't understand," for a borg she wasn't the brightest of beings, "shouldn't it be Admiral Janeway that is upset by what happened, as she is carrying your child, rather than me?"

"Well I guess," he said slowly, suddenly realising that he and Kathryn had never really spoken about that, or what would have happened had thay not returned to Earth when they did.

"If anything I am flattered that you would chose me over Admiral Janeway," Seven seemed to genuinly believe her words.

Chakotay paused, he didn't want to hurt her, but he realised he couldn't let her go on thinking that he had chosen her over Kathryn. "Seven, it wasn't a case of chosing anyone over anyone else, I just realised that sooner or later I should move on, and you offered me that oppertunity." She nodded, maybe she was starting to understand, or maybe she was just pretending to. He stood there for another awkward second, before deciding that it was probably time that he returned to the house. "I think I've said all that I needed to say," he broke the silence, "maybe we should go back inside and join the others," he attempted a weak smile.

As he made his way past her, she put her arm out and stopped him, before he could question what she was going, she had come around and placed her lips on his. For a moment he didn't know what to do, so let her kiss him, but then sense kicked in and he lifted his hands to her upper arms and peeled himself away from her. She looked confused.

"What are you doing?" he asked angrily, trying to keep his voice calm.

Seven frowned, "I thought this was what you wanted."

He shook his head, "I'm sorry if I've mislead you in anyway Seven, but this is the last thing that I want."

She blinked once, then twice, as if she didn't quite believe what she was hearing, "I'm sorry, I just thought that..."

"Thought what Seven? That just because I'd dated you before on Voyager whilst I had feelings for Kathryn, that I'd be willing to do it again?" His face looked thunderous, "the last thing I want is to jeopordise what I have with her, and that means that this, can never happen."

For the first time that he'd ever witnessed, Seven looked about ready to cry, and it was with great relief that Chakotay heard Tom calling his name. He cast one final look at the former borg drone, "I'm sorry," he said, before walking passed her and towards the sound of the pilot's voice.

"Ah Chakotay, there you are." Tom was standing at the back door, he'd been about ready to go back inside when he'd seen the dark shadow approach from somewhere in his garden.

"What's up Tom?" Chakotay crossed the patio and made his way to the door.

Tom frowned, about to ask what Chakotay was doing alone in the dark garden, when he saw Seven appear from the same direction that Chakotay had just appeared from. "There's some men at the front door," he said, his eyes still on Seven, "they say that they want to speak with you."

Chakotay turned, following the direction of Tom's gaze, saw Seven coming up from behind him, and quickly looking back. "I'll go and find out what they want," he replied quickly, stepping through the door and making his way over to the front of the house.

Tom smiled reluctantly at Seven, before disappearing back inside himself.

They were StarFleet, and there were two of them. "Commander Chakotay?" one of them stepped forwards as he appeared at the threshold of the house.

"I resigned my commision five months ago," he said slowly, his mind darting to why they were there, "but I am Chakotay."

The other man suddenly came to life, "your commision has been reactivated Commander."

"By who?" Chakotay demanded.

"It is irrelevant," the same man replied.

"We have been sent here to take you with us to Cardassia prime, under Admiral Paris' orders," the first one informed him.

Chakotay frowned as mixed feelings overwhelmed him. He was angry that his commision had been reactivated without his consent, and that he was now being given orders. Bad memories of the Cardassians returned to him, and he felt sick to think that he might have to go to their homeworld. Then the sickness that he felt increased, as he realised that Kathryn was there, and he was struck with a sudden panic as the thought that something may have happened to her occured to him.

"Is this about Admiral Janeway?" he asked a little shakily.

"We are not at liberty to discuss that," the first said, "we ask that you come with us."

Feeling he had no other choice, he nodded. Within seconds he felt the familiar buzz of the transporter, and left the Paris household without time to say goodbye to any of his friends.

The next few days seemed to move quickly and blurred together to form just one single memory. He was taken aboard a shuttle, that was already in orbit of Earth, and within seconds they were on their way to Cardassia. It was once they were a safe distance of two light years from Earth, that the two men escorting him, finally told him why he was there. He instantly felt a whole lot worse, and went to the toilet to throw up. He stayed there for the next few hours, not trusting his stomach enough to move anywhere.

He escorts let him be, for the entire trip to Cardassia; they were happy enough with each others company, and realised that he probably wanted time alone.

It took three days at maximum warp to reach the former enemy home planet. They landed the shuttle, not trusting to use their own transporters, for fear that a terrorist may interfer with the beam and kill them.

It had been a terrorist attack of course, on Cardassia prime which had started it.

There had always been threats, and they had always been the same: 'StarFleet does not belong on Cardassia; leave'. But they had always been ignored. The attack had been focussed on the embasy, where Kathryn had been in the middle of a conference at the time. No one was at liberty to tell him what the hell the conference had been about, and Chakotay was starting to get the impression, that they only people that knew were either dead or as good as.

He felt a whole lot worse when he discovered that the attack had been made by the last remaining Maquis, still angry at the Cardassians. Although they still called themselves the Maquis, the federation had long ago offered an amnesty to all Maquis that had fought along side them during the war. So, to ensure that the new breed of Maquis were condemned for their actions, they had been renamed the MSS, the Maquis Sub-Section (MSHS- Maquis Shit Head Section was their unofficial name). It didn't make Chakotay feel any better though.

In his daze, he was hardly aware of the Cardassians that stopped and stared as they walked along the street. "Maybe we ought to have landed a little closer to the hospital," Morgan muttered to his friend.

"Maybe," he friend was little more concerned with the humidity of the planet.

They entered the hospital and went up to the front desk. For a planet still recovering from years of military rule, and a few years of war, the hospital was suprisingly luxurious.

"This is where Guls used to come for treatment," Gregson muttered an explanation across to Chakotay, "it's now reserved for diplomats and representatives."

The particular wing of the hospital which they were directed to, was very well air conditioned, and seemed cold at first when they entered, but looking across at the temperature display, he quickly noticed that it was 21oC, normal room temperature for humans.

A doctor stepped forwards, he had a name but Chakotay didn't quite catch it. He was lead across the room to another door, which was opened for him and so he stepped inside. There was a human nurse standing by the incubater, she looked up and smiled when they entered, before contunuing to check on the readings.

He peered over the top to see a three day old baby lying in the blankets. Slowly, he reached out and touched the baby's head, sparcely covered with hair. "Commander, this is your daughter," the doctor informed him.

Chakotay looked up suddenly, reality finally hitting him in the face with a inaudiable thump that made him suddenly more aware of his surroundings. He let out a sharp breath that he hadn't realised he'd been holding, and quickly made his way out of the room, found a chair against the wall and sat down, holding his head in his hands.

End of chapter four.


	5. The official story

Disclaimer: Star trek: Voyager and its characters belong to Paramount.

Author's note: I'm glad you all seem to be enjoying this story so far, so please keep up giving me feedback, and I'll keep up posting chapters. Enjoy.

Chapter five: The official story

Back on the shuttle he'd been on autopilot; he'd eaten and slept and read a book and washed and shaved and for some reason thrown up at the smell of coffee. But the two days after landing on Cardassia he hadn't bothered to do any, never leaving the seat that he sat at except to go to the toilet. A few times the nurse had brought his daughter to him, and he had held a bottle robotically to her mouth and watched her feed, or had just held her until she fell asleep, but he never went out of his way to see her.

He knew it was wrong. He knew that he should be happy; he was a father, he had a beautiful baby daughter, but the thought that Kathryn wasn't there to share it with him broke his heart every time that he saw the baby. He'd cried once, on the second day, but he was cried out by the third day.

Chakotay drank of course, but only coffee, or at his weaker moments: whisky. It was the only thing keeping him from dying, other than hope that she would wake up of course.

She had been so pale when he'd first seen her, but the machine by her side ensured that her lips were still warm when he'd leaned over to kiss her. He'd only kissed her the once though, it felt wrong when he didn't feel her respond, when he didn't feel her arms wrap around his body.

He'd asked if he could take her back to Earth, but the doctors had replied that it would be too dangerous to move her in such a fragile state. He had asked to contact someone; her family, some friends, but for some reason unknown to him, they had said that he couldn't. He didn't bother to fight their reply, he was too exhausted from sleeping so little.

Then, on the fifth day, as he sat with his daughter in his arms, and a coffee by his side, he saw movement. It wasn't the first time he's seen Kathryn move, it happened to coma patients he'd been told, from time to time, and it didn't always mean anything. But still, he couldn't help but hope. She stilled again, and his heart sank. The nurse came, took the sleeping baby from his arms, and he was left alone with Kathryn.

He had been on the verge of sleep when he had again noticed movement from the bed beside him. Chakotay sat up a little straighter, and then noticed her eyes flicker. She had more colour in her face, and then when she opened her eyes, her face was filled with life. Kathryn glanced around the room and frowned, then her eyes rested on him, and he got up from his chair and sat on the edge of her bed and smiled.

Her frown deepened as tears filled his eyes and he reached out to touch her face, just to see if she was real, that he wasn't dreaming. Her blue eyes locked with his brown, her eyelids separated the connection once, twice, and third time, and then severed the connection completely, as her eyes closed.

"Kathryn," Chakotay said calmly, brushing her lips with his thumb, "Kathryn," he said again when she didn't respond. He shot off the bed and ran to the door of her room, shouting for a doctor.

Two days later.

The seventh day and Chakotay was standing outside Kathryn's room talking to a couple of StarFleet officials. One was Gregson, who he had first met ten days before, and the second was a woman that he'd never before seen. "It's important that no one finds out about the attack," the woman informed him.

He frowned, "why not?"

Gregson sighed, "Admiral Janeway's presence here is very important to StarFleet, if the public were to find out that she in particular was targeted by terrorists, then they would be pressured to assign her somewhere safer."

"So you're saying," Chakotay looked frantically between them, "that she's going to have to stay here?"

"We have already discussed the situation with the Admiral, and she has agreed the staying here is in the best interests of all sides," the woman said calmly, obviously trained to deal such situations.

He looked from Gregson and back to the woman, they weren't joking. Without saying another word to either of them, he stepped into the room, to see Kathryn sitting up in her bed with their sleeping baby in her arms. She looked up and smiled sweetly across at a very angry Chakotay, before returning her attention to their daughter. "She's beautiful," she ran a hand over the infant's head, admiring their creation once again.

"You're not staying here," he stated and moved to sit on the side of her bed.

She looked up at him, "so they've told you," she said coolly.

"Kathryn, come back to Earth with me."

"I can't," she replied quietly, purposefully looking at their baby to avoid meeting his eyes, "there's still a lot of work that I need to do here."

"Do it on Earth, do it on Vulcan, do it on Romulus if you have to, just anywhere but Cardassia," he pleaded desperately, now that he had her back he was suddenly aware that he was in his enemy's territory.

She looked up and reached a hand out to touch his face, "I'm not asking you to stay."

His face shot around and their eyes locked fiercely, "what about Yuna?"

Kathryn looked back down at her daughter, "you should probably take her back with you."

For a moment he was too stunned to speak, but only a moment, "no, I'm not going back without you, and you're not staying here."

"I hear that they've reactivated your commission," she changed the subject.

He frowned, "it was the only way that Admiral Paris could find to get me here, apparently civilians aren't allowed to stay here, they say it's too dangerous!"

Kathryn let out a long breath, "don't make me order you to leave," she gazed fiercely at him.

He looked at her for a moment, not quite believing what he was hearing, "eight days in a coma hasn't changed you, has it Kathryn?" he shot snidely.

"Fuck you Chakotay!" she near to shouted angrily.

Suddenly he stood from the edge of her bed, towering over her, he looked away. Taking some deep calming breaths, he finally found the strength to look at her without mirroring her anger. "I'll take Yuna back to Earth with me, but if I don't hear that you've left Cardassia within a week of my return, I'm getting on the next transport here to drag you back kicking and screaming if I have to."

Both of them were actually quite amazed with the speed at which they were able to plunge back into an argument after Kathryn's very near to death experience, which not only had nearly cost her life, but also that of their daughter's, and probably eventually, Chakotay's well being.

He left the next day without saying goodbye.

The official story was that Admiral Janeway had gone into labour prematurely after a gas leak had caused an explosion in the embassy on Cardassia. However the premature labour had had its complications and left her in a coma for eight days. The press were so busy focussing on the newborn Janeway, (predicted already to be the next most promising StarFleet officer,) and the Admiral's quick return to duty, that they seemed to totally ignore the officers killed in the explosion along with five Cardassians.

The week passed, and Chakotay still hadn't heard that she was on her way back, but when he had attempted to get on a transport, he'd kindly been informed that StarFleet had ordered him to be grounded on Earth. He'd been furious, but his attempts to contact Kathryn also failed, so he just sulked.

When he'd first arrived back on Earth, he'd soon found himself confined to Kathryn's apartment as the press refused to leave him alone. His only contact with the outside world came from his visitors, who were always screened by security officers before even being allowed to enter the building, and then again before being allowed to knock on the front door.

One of his fist visitors had been Kathryn's mother. It wasn't the first time that he'd met her, having met her briefly two times before, but it was the first time that he'd actually spoken properly with her. He'd found her a wonderful woman, very much like Kathryn in so many ways, but much more laid back and open. She'd invited him to stay with her at the family home, but he'd turned down her offer, in the hope that Kathryn would soon return, and help him out with the midnight feedings.

The old Voyager crew slowly made their ways to the front door. Tom and B'Elanna were among the first, then Tuvok made his way from Vulcan with his wife T'Pel. Naomi had come with both her parents, although she'd spent most of the time holding Yuna, she seemed much more interested in telling Chakotay stories of her father. He'd smiled, and hoped the one day his daughter would speak so fondly of him. It was with great relief that he never recieved a visit from Seven, it would have been too awkward, as he wouldn't have known what to say to her.

Eventually the press started to lose interest, and the security to his apartment started to become slack, letting the odd stray photographer or reporter make his or her way to Chakotay's front door.

He wasn't quite sure whether to consider the apartment Kathryn's, theirs, or even his (as she had not even been there for the past month). That night that he'd arrived from visiting his sister, he'd stayed the night in the spare bedroom, and after a discussion the following morning, it had been decided that he should stay with her, in the spare bedroom.

That was another thing that was starting to get to him, he and Kathryn had again reached that point where the parameters of their relationship needed to be defined, but to Chakotay's annoyance Kathryn had avoided the topic quite successfully, and so no definition had been made. He knew that he loved her, and that she loved him, but he still wasn't sure if they were going to go anywhere with their feelings. Sure, they had a daughter together, and they were living together, but that didn't necessarily mean that they were going to be together.

It was after Gretchen's second visit to see her grand daughter, that Chakotay decided to accept her offer to stay at her house in Indiana. After a week of not sleeping through the night, or knowing why the hell his daughter was crying, he accepted that he needed help from an expert, and Gretchen was that expert, after all, if she could handle Kathryn, he was sure that she could handle her daughter's daughter.

"You heard anything from my caffeine addicted daughter?" Gretchen asked one morning, three days into his stay at her house.

Chakotay looked up from the morning paper and shrugged. "I got a letter from her this morning, but she didn't mention whether or not she was planning on coming back any time soon."

Gretchen smiled, almost apologetically, "that's my daughter for you," she said, "too much like her father; stubborn and obsessed with work."

He lifted his mug of coffee to his lips, and sipped some of the dark liquid, "how did you manage?"

She laughed, "Edward and I broke up so many times before either of the girls arrived, our friends were surprised that we even bothered to stay married. Of course by the time Kathryn and her sister came along, we'd come to an unspoken agreement; I wouldn't bother him about his work, and he'd take time out to come with me to the lectures I used to give or attend, without complaining."

"So you always stayed together?"

"Unless he was going on one of his suicide missions, then we'd try to stay together." She grinned as she thought back, "and up until he became a Commander, he was often stationed aboard space stations, or on various planets, so he was always in the same place, which made it easier for us to go from home to home to satisfy both our couriers."

He nodded slowly, "and what about when he was promoted to Admiral?"

Gretchen grimaced a little, "he'd go off on missions still," she shrugged, "but never for more than a few months at a time, and never very often."

"You don't suppose that Kathryn will ever allow herself to be grounded for more than a few months?" he asked, taking another sip of his coffee.

The older woman laughed lightly, "she's been on the go for seven years Chakotay, just give her a little time to slow down and reflect on everything that's happened."

He nodded slowly, "I'm just hoping that she slows down before she misses out on our daughter growing up."

End of chapter five.


	6. Reunion

Disclaimer: Paramount hogs Voyager and all its characters.

Author's note: here's the sixth chapter, enjoy!

V

Chapter six: Reunion.

Kathryn sat at her desk, her body screaming at her to sleep for a few hours, but her mind telling her hand to lift the mug of coffee to her lips. She picked up another padd, and noticing the word count at the top of it, he groaned aloud, feeling another headache approach.

The buzzer at her officer door went, "come," she called out.

A tall Cardassian that she instantly recognised as Tradjiv entered. "I hope I'm not desturbing anything," he said at her doorway.

"No," she said, rubbing the temples of her scull with her finger tips, "please, come in," she nodded towards the chair opposite her.

He did as suggested, and moved further in towards her office, sitting himself down opposite her. "Until I met you I considered all humans weak and fragile," he said as one of her hands reached out for her mug.

She blushed a little, and smiled slightly, "thanks," she said, "I think."

Tradjiv chuckled lightly, "I understand now that you're all just mad."

Kathryn laughed, "so what are you here for?"

He sighed, "we've had another bomb threat, and after what happened last time, we're not taking it lightly."

She let out an exhausted groan, "so what does this mean? I'm already surrounded by security at all times as it is, there's even security keeping an eye on my daughter back on Earth. Everyone entering the planet has to go through screening, and so do all imports, the new embasy being built will probably be completely bomb proof; I don't see what else we can really do."

"I was thinking we could bring in some help from outside," he started, "I have read that your chief security officer onboard Voyager developed a way of observing people from great distances, maybe we could adapt that technology for our own purposes. Especially with the impending announcement," he added.

Kathryn sighed, "and what if we did do that? We'd be denying people their freedom, we can't become a big brother."

"Big brother?" Tradjiv questioned.

"Have you ever read Nineteen-Eighty-Four?" he shook his head, "it's an Earth book written a few decades before the actual year that it's set in. The writer explores a world that is constantly monitored by an unseen dictator, calling himself 'big brother'. The book served as a warning to my people even a century after it was written. If people had have paid a little more attention to books such as that, the third world war may have been averted," she added thoughtfully.

"So that's a no to my suggestion then?" he didn't seem too disappointed, he's been working with Kathryn long enough to know to expect such an answer.

"It's a 'not yet'," she replied with a short smile, "we'll see how bad things get after the announcement."

He nodded, and there was a short pause of silence between the two of them. "Would you care to join me for dinner tonight?" he suggested.

Although her stomach grumbled she turned down his offer, "I promised Chakotay that I'd call him tonight, he's angry enough with me as it is," she made her excuse.

Tradjiv smiled anyway, "you and this Chakotay, are you together?"

Kathryn frowned, "not exclusively," she answered honestly.

"But you have a child together?"

She nodded, "it's complicated."

"You don't love each other?"

She smiled despite herself, "we do love each other, but as I've said, it's complicated."

Tradjiv nodded thoughtfully to himself, before standing from his seat, "I think I was right, humans are mad."

Kathryn laughed lightly, and watched him as he left her office, her mind wondering to Chakotay.

V

Over a week later.

Chakotay waited at the transport station for Kathryn's arrival. He seemed to go totally unnoticed by the large group to press standing chatting with coffees in their hands. It was always that way whenever he went out of the house, often if he was with his daughter he'd have large crowds around him, but without her he felt invisable. It was at such times when he became invisable that he realised he preferred it that way, and then, with some reluctance, he realised that he could never be invisable or live a 'normal' life as long as he was with Kathryn.

There was an announcement by a computer generated voice that her shuttle had landed. As he stood with the intention of making his way to the door from where she would appear from, he noticed half the room had already made its way over there. He sat back down, and watched distantly as the doors opened and the room was consumed by flashes, loud shouts for attention, and other loud shouts from security to 'move back'.

Kathryn straightened her uniform, again, and looked over to the fromer Gul Trajiv who stood beside her. "Admiral," an ensign came forwards, "I thought I should just warn you there's a large crowd out there waiting for you."

She sighed, there always was. In some ways the trip to Cardassia had been a vacation from all the hassle of the press. "Thank you for the warning ensign," she smiled professionally.

Trajiv noticed the professional smile that she sometimes used instead of her warm and genuine smile, and much preferred the latter, finding her professional tone sometimes a little too perfect.

They stepped forwards and the doors opened, almost blinded as they were assaulted by bright flashing lights. Kathryn smiled curtiously at them all for a brief few seconds, allowing them to get the pictures that they needed, before allowing her face to drop as she looked around the large station's centre.

The platform that they had walked out onto was slightly above the gathering of press, and she instantly spotted Chakotay sitting looking away from the large group at the far end of the enourmous transport centre. Her attention was brought back to the press when she heard the security officers shouting to allow her and the other highly ranking officials through.

Admiral Benson, being the attention seeking arsehole that he was, stayed on the platform and started to speak to the press. Giving Kathryn an oppertunity to walk down the few steps and leave the group of officials to the mercy of the press, as she crossed the expanse in the direction of where she had seen Chakotay.

At seeing her emerge from the doors with a wide smile he'd turned his head from the scene, obviously she hadn't missed him at all in their three weeks apart. Sure, she'd called him from time to time, but their conversations had always been short, and centered around their daughter, who Chakotay had left with Gretchen, now wishing that he'd just stayed at the house.

He looked up sharply when he felt eyes on him, and saw Kathryn standing before him, clad in her uniform with a wide and genuine smile on her face. Chakotay stood quickly from his chair, and returned the smile, moving to wrap his arms around her.

At first she was reluctant to embrace him in a public place, littered with press, but couldn't hold back as she quickly realised how much she'd truely missed him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and pulled back just far enough to come face to face with him. He frowned, but didn't move away when she kissed him, instead chosing to return the kiss. They deepened the kiss a little, and didn't break apart from each other, until they were both aware of a crowd around them.

Chakotay pulled back, and noticing the photographers around them, grinned sheepishly. Kathryn gripped his hand, and with the help of some security made her way out of the group, with Chakotay closely behind. They eventually made their way towards the transporter room, where they transported directly to another transporter room, this time in a hotel.

V

He wasn't quite sure what to make of her decision to take a double room, but followed her into the lift, then down the corridor, and eventually into the relevant room. Chakotay then realised that Kathryn's hand hadn't left his since the reunion.

They stepped through the doors of the hotel room, and Kathryn let out an exhausted groan as she dropped his hand, looking around the room for a replicater. She spotted it and made her way over towards it. "Coffee?" she asked over her shoulder.

"Tea please," he said, sitting down on one of the sofas in the large suite.

Some moments later, she placed a cup of tea on the short table in front of him, and sat back on the sofa beside him, with a mug of coffee in her hand. "I'm so sorry about the past few weeks Chakotay," she confessed.

He shrugged, "you're back now," he said, looking around the suite, wondering why she'd brought him there.

She sighed, "back but not finised," he looked sharply across at her with a confused expression. "I still have a lot of work to finish off, and then I'll probably have to go back to Cardassia in a few months."

"Why?" he wasn't sure if he was more disappointed or angry, but to Kathryn his voice sounded hurt.

Kathryn looked at him for a few seconds, wanting desperately to tell him everything, but she was sure that his reaction would not be possitive, and the last thing she wanted was for him to become unpredictable. "I'm sorry Chakotay, I can't tell you that," she told him at last.

He nodded, although annoyed by her response. "Can you tell me why you've brought me here?" up until that point he would have been more than happy for her to use him in anyway that she would have wanted, but her refusal to trust him forced him to raise some barriers.

"I'm going to be staying here for the next week or so," she thought she might as well come right out and say it.

"Right," he said slowly, his anger boiling beneath the surface, he'd assumed when she'd said she was on her way back, that she was actually returning to be a mother to their daughter. "What about Yuna?"

Kathryn bit her lip, knowing that Chakotay wasn't going to like whatever she said, (he wasn't in the mood to be pleasant). "I'll be able to visit you reguarly now that I'm back on Earth," she tried to make it sound like a reasonable suggestion, but even she realised that it wasn't enough before she even opened her mouth.

He looked away and considered her proposal for a moment, then turned back round and met her gaze, "no," he shook his head, "our baby is a month old already Kathryn, and you've seen her for what? Two days."

"Well I can hardly help being in a coma for the first eight days of her life," she said in a clipped tone.

"And what about these past three weeks?" he looked at her expectantly. She looked away from him, but he continued regardless. "She wouldn't even recognise you if went and picked her up and held her for a few moments. Hell Kathryn, you wouldn't even recognise your own daughter."

She turned back sharply at that, her anger showing through her prefectly constructed mask, "what do you want me to do Chakotay? I'm trying to make a difference here! Do you want me to stand back and tell StarFleet that I can't do my duty until my daughter's started school."

"Yes," he replied honestly, "I want you to tell StarFleet to find someone else."

"Chakotay I can't," she confessed, "I'm too far envolved, and even if I wasn't," she turned back to him, "I wouldn't know how to step back."

Chakotay looked at her for a few moments, considering everything, considering what to say, what to do. He was angry at her, and frustrated by what she was doing, but somehow he managed to calm himself down, and utter the words, "I love you," to her.

Kathryn swallowed hard, calming down instantly at his words. Slowly she leaned forwards, and again kissed him on the lips, this time tenderly and with a gentleness unexpected from such a fiercly respected Admiral. Part of Chakotay's mind screamed at him to stop, warning him that he was going to get hurt if he returned the kiss, but he ignored that part of his mind and deepened it. There was no way that he would ever be able to refuse her, he realised as she started to undress him, and so he left himself to her mercy.

V

End of chapter six.


	7. Most people

Disclaimer: Paramount owns Voyager and it's characters.

V

Chapter seven: Most people.

He wasn't quite sure what to make of her decision to take a double room, but followed her into the lift, then down the corridor, and eventually into the relevant room. Chakotay then realised that Kathryn's hand hadn't left his since the reunion.

They stepped through the doors of the hotel room, and Kathryn let out an exhausted groan as she dropped his hand, looking around the room for a replicater. She spotted it and made her way over towards it. "Coffee?" she asked over her shoulder.

"Tea please," he said, sitting down on one of the sofas in the large suite.

Some moments later, she placed a cup of tea on the short table in front of him, and sat back on the sofa beside him, with a mug of coffee in her hand. "I'm so sorry about the past few weeks Chakotay," she confessed.

He shrugged, "you're back now," he said, looking around the suite, wondering why she'd brought him there.

She sighed, "back but not finished," he looked sharply across at her with a confused expression. "I still have a lot of work to finish off, and then I'll probably have to go back to Cardassia in a few months."

"Why?" he wasn't sure if he was more disappointed or angry, but to Kathryn his voice sounded hurt.

Kathryn looked at him for a few seconds, wanting desperately to tell him everything, but she was sure that his reaction would not be positive, and the last thing she wanted was for him to become unpredictable. "I'm sorry Chakotay, I can't tell you that," she told him at last.

He nodded, although annoyed by her response. "Can you tell me why you've brought me here?" up until that point he would have been more than happy for her to use him in anyway that she would have wanted, but her refusal to trust him forced him to raise some barriers.

"I'm going to be staying here for the next week or so," she thought she might as well come right out and say it.

"Right," he said slowly, his anger boiling beneath the surface, he'd assumed when she'd said she was on her way back, that she was actually returning to be a mother to their daughter. "What about Yuna?"

Kathryn bit her lip, knowing that Chakotay wasn't going to like whatever she said, (he wasn't in the mood to be pleasant). "I'll be able to visit you regularly now that I'm back on Earth," she tried to make it sound like a reasonable suggestion, but even she realised that it wasn't enough before she even opened her mouth.

He looked away and considered her proposal for a moment, then turned back round and met her gaze, "no," he shook his head, "our baby is a month old already Kathryn, and you've seen her for what? Two days."

"Well I can hardly help being in a coma for the first eight days of her life," she said in a clipped tone.

"And what about these past three weeks?" he looked at her expectantly. She looked away from him, but he continued regardless. "She wouldn't even recognise you if went and picked her up and held her for a few moments. Hell Kathryn, you wouldn't even recognise your own daughter."

She turned back sharply at that, her anger showing through her perfectly constructed mask, "what do you want me to do Chakotay? I'm trying to make a difference here! Do you want me to stand back and tell StarFleet that I can't do my duty until my daughter's started school."

"Yes," he replied honestly, "I want you to tell StarFleet to find someone else."

"Chakotay I can't," she confessed, "I'm too far involved, and even if I wasn't," she turned back to him, "I wouldn't know how to step back."

Chakotay looked at her for a few moments, considering everything, considering what to say, what to do. He was angry at her, and frustrated by what she was doing, but somehow he managed to calm himself down, and utter the words, "I love you," to her.

Kathryn swallowed hard, calming down instantly at his words. Slowly she leaned forwards, and again kissed him on the lips, this time tenderly and with a gentleness unexpected from such a fiercely respected Admiral. Part of Chakotay's mind screamed at him to stop, warning him that he was going to get hurt if he returned the kiss, but he ignored that part of his mind and deepened it. There was no way that he would ever be able to refuse her, he realised as she started to undress him, and so he left himself to her mercy.

V

Chakotay woke the next morning to an empty bed. At first he wasn't sure of his memories of that night, then reminding himself that he was in an unfamiliar bed, he realised that he and Kathryn had slept together. He sat up and looked around the bedroom, but she wasn't anywhere to be seen. Then he heard her. She was speaking to a man the other side of the bedroom door. He climbed out of the bed and looked around the room for his boxers, pulling them on, and then found his pants lying on the floor a little closer to the door.

He would have dressed more fully before emerging from the bedroom of the suite, but he knew that his shirt was in the other room, and Kathryn had clearly not bothered to collect his clothes together.

Kathryn and Paul looked up from the sofa when her bedroom door opened and Chakotay walked out, his hair falling all over the place. He looked across at the two of them, sitting, drinking coffee and frowned. She attempted a smile, but felt more than a little awkward, "Chakotay, this is my brother in law Paul," she made the first introduction, "Paul, this is Chakotay," she didn't describe her relationship to him, not knowing herself exactly what it was.

The two men smiled at each other. "Phoebe's husband right?" Chakotay had met Kathryn's sister several times at Gretchen's house, but had never met her husband before.

He smiled, "yep. Yuna's father right?"

Chakotay grinned, still standing awkwardly by the door to the bedroom, uncomfortably aware that he wasn't wearing any thing on the upper half of his body. Then his frown returned, "you don't mind me asking why you're here do you?"

Kathryn stood, "Paul just came to do a check up," she explained, picking up a shirt that was folded on the sofa's arm.

"A check up?" he looked even more confused.

"I'm Kathryn's doctor," Paul explained with a smile, "was five years before she took command of Voyager, and for the past seven months since she got back."

Chakotay was handed his shirt, which he took from Kathryn exchanging a brief smile. "Oh right," he said quietly to himself, still a little tired as he pulled the shirt over his head.

"Plus Kathryn's mother was freaking out a little when you didn't come back last night, so called me to see if you were with Kathryn." He stood up, "but I can see you're here, and fine, and it seems that Kathryn's doing fine also, so I think I'd better make myself scarce."

She turned back round to him, "oh okay," she didn't sound too disappointed, "and tell Phoebe that I plan to visit the three of you in a few days or so."

He just chuckled lightly, "I'll tell her." Paul picked up a case by his feet and stood from his seat. Making his way over to the two of them, he extended his hand which Chakotay shook, "it was nice to meet you at last," he smiled. "And Kathryn," he turned back round to her, placing a hand on her shoulder, "I don't suppose you're going to listen, but I'm going to tell you anyway; take it easy."

She placed a hand naturally on his chest and placed a kiss on his cheek, "I'll see you later Paul," she said, and with no further exchange of words he left the hotel's suite.

There was a pause of silence between Kathryn and Chakotay, before she turned back round to him, "do you want to take a shower, and then come down with me to the restaurant to grab some breakfast?"

Chakotay raised an eyebrow, "you're actually going to eat some breakfast?"

Kathryn smiled gently at him, "it can be our first official date."

He looked at her for a moment, as if he couldn't quite believe what she was saying, then nodded with a grin. "Most people have the date before they sleep together," he pointed out.

She shot him a mock serious expression, "and most people date for at least a few months before they have a child together; we're going to have to face it sooner or later Chakotay: we're not most people."

Chuckling lightly placed a kiss on her lips, "I wouldn't have it any other way though," he admitted, before heading towards the shower, turning just before he reached the doors of the bathroom. "What's Paul's surname?" he asked when Kathryn noticed his hesitation to enter the other room.

She frowned, "Kline," there was a pause, "why?"

Chakotay thought back to the letter that he had received telling him that he was going to be a father, which had been sent from a P J Kline. Suddenly one more thing in the complex universe made sense to him. He didn't say anything significant though, and shrugged. "Just wondered," he replied, heading off to take his shower.

V

End of chapter seven.


	8. Announcement

Chapter eight: Announcement.

Two weeks later.

It was drawing towards the end of the summer, the evenings were still light, and the morning still early, but there was that tension in the air that warned that autumn was approaching. It was mid afternoon, and the sun was still quite high in the sky, but there was plenty of shade and a cool breeze that countered the sun's attempts to over heat the surface. Beneath one of the trees, basking in the shade that it provided, Kathryn sat with her daughter and Chakotay on the lush green grass.

She smiled as Chakotay lifted their small baby up to his face and kissed her belly, before resting her back on his lap. He reached out, a smile still plastered on his lips, and grabbed another sandwich from the picnic food layed out on the blanket. "You're amazing with her you know," Kathryn admired.

He shrugged, "she's a lot easier than her mother."

The quip caused Kathryn to shoot him a mock death glare, and he tried his best to stifle a grin (he didn't do very well). They again relaxed into a comfortable silence, "this is nice," she sighed.

Chakotay looked up, his six week old daughter squirming a little in his firm grasp, "hmm," he agreed.

"I was thinking," she started.

"Uh-oh."

"What?" she turned sharply to him.

"I'm sorry," he picked up his glass of wine, and put it to his lips, "I've just heard you say that so many times on Voyager, that I get a little weary everytime you start to think."

She threw him a sarcastic smile, which just caused a flicker of a grin to cast over his face. "Anyway," she tried again.

"This doesn't involve me does it?" he looked a little worried.

"Will you let me finish?"

"Sorry, go on."

"Well actually, it does involve you," he pulled a face, but she ignored it, and decided to go on anyway. "I was thinking that, I don't want Yuna to grow up an only child."

Chakotay frowned, "she won't, she'll have Miral and," he paused, then realisation hit him, "oh," he said, finally getting what she meant, she rolled her eyes, "you mean us having more children?"

"Well that was kind of what I meant Chakotay," she came close to patronising him, but resisted.

"Oh, okay," he said thoughtfully.

"Well obviously not right away," she ammended, "but one day," her eyes locked with his, "what do you think?"

For a moment he didn't really know what he thought, he'd just been happy with Kathryn and Yuna, he'd never really thought about extending what he already had. "I'm not sure," he said at last, and at the expression on her that followed, he realised that maybe that wasn't the answer he was supposed to have given. "It's just you're always working Kathryn," he tried to explain his initial reluctance, "I love you, and don't get me wrong, I'd love us to have more children together, but I really don't think that we could make it work with more than just the one."

She still looked disappointed, so he went on, "I was hoping to go back to university once Yuna's a bit older, and start on my phd, and I don't want to be that guy stuck at home with all the kids, that you come home to when you feel like it."

"Right," she sounded less than happy, "if that's the way you feel."

"It is," he didn't see the point in lying to her, it was better that he be honest with her from the start.

The rest of their picnic passed awkwardly, and they were both actually relieved when Yuna started crying, and soon decided to head back to their appartment in San Francisco.

The next day.

Tom looked round at B'Elanna after having watched the news vids with her, "at least we now know what Kathryn spent those two months on Cardassia doing," he pointed out.

She shot him a glare, clearly further agrivated by his relaxed tone, "they can't join the federation," she said angrily.

Suddenly he felt like running, but he was already sitting on the sofa, and B'Elanna would catch up with him before he could even unlock the front door. "Well," he said carefully, "it seems that they're going to try."

"I still don't get why Admiral Janeway's at the centre of this," she was fuming beneath her sensible words.

Tom shrugged, "my dad says that it's got something to do with her not being here for the entire war, she's never really been in battle with them, and so it makes her one of the most neutral Admirals in StarFleet."

B'Elanna got up from her seat, "do you think Chakotay knew about any of this?"

Why was she asking him? he looked around the room, but there weren't any answers. "I'm not sure, but he probably does now," he replied.

She made her way past her husband, "I'm going to call him."

Chakotay had known prior to the announcement made by some Vulcan at the press conference shown on the new vids, but only that night as Kathryn had lain beside him. "They're going to join," she'd told him, nestled into the side of him.

He'd frowned, "who?"

"The Cardassians, they're going to join the federation."

He hadn't been sure what he should say, and so didn't say anything. It was quite a few hours later, and he was confronted with an angry B'Elanna, demanding if he'd known. "I found out about the same time you did," he answered honestly, he didn't think a day's notice before the announcement really counted as anything significant.

"They can't actually let them join can they?" the question was asked in disbelief, but he guessed that she probably wanted an answer.

"It seems that they're going to B'Elanna," he answered calmly.

"And you're not going to do anything about it?" she was fuming.

"What can I really do?" his soft voice just agrivating her further, "the decision has been made."

"They killed our friends!" she shouted over the comm., "you're not just going to let Kathryn open her arms and forgive them like they didn't do anything wrong."

"I don't think this about forgiveness," he said slowly, "I think this is about moving on."

She glared at him for a few moments, "I can see where you stand on this."

Before he could make any form of reply, she terminated the transmission and was gone from his view.

The day after that.

"This is not about forgetting, or forgiving, or lessening the efforts of all those that were lost." Kathryn said calmly to the large crowd before her, Admiral Benson to one side of her, looking more than pissed off that she was giving the speech and not him. "This is about accepting what has happened, and trying to move on, of being the better side and showing the Cardassian people that democracy will not leave them starving on the streets, or fighting a pointless war."

There were some shouts from the large crowd.

"What do you know? You weren't part of this war."

"Have you even ever met a Cardassian in battle?"

"Traitor!"

She swallowed, and gave the crowd her best death glare, silencing most of them. "True, I was not on the front of this war, but I am as patriotic as any other StarFleet officer, and like any other officer, I have met the Cardassian's in battle, and I do know what it is to lose good friends to them. But we were fighting different Cardassians, we were fighting their military, and like us, they were following orders. Maybe if we can be the first to offer our hand of friendship, we can once and for all stop fighting."

Kathryn stepped back, and allowed Benson his chance to bullshit to the press and various other representatives within the crowd.

That night Kathryn walked into her bedroom, after putting Yuna to sleep, to find Chakotay sitting up with the bedside lamp on, reading. He looked up from his book after she'd been standing in the doorway for some time, to try to figure out why she hadn't entered. He gave her a questioning look. "Maybe I should sleep in the spare room tonight," she suggested.

Chakotay frowned, "I'm already confortable here," he protested.

"I meant we should sleep seperately," she said tiredly.

"I know you did," he went back to his book.

Not sure what to make of his attitude she left the room, to take the bed in the spare room. Since he had found out what she had been doing on Cardassia for all those weeks, their relationship had been very strained. She knew that he still didn't trust them, and more than that, didn't want her involved. But he also knew that there was nothing he could do to stop her, and so he hadn't said anything to her. It was the fact that he wasn't speaking to her about it, that was getting to her the most, it was unlike him to not confront something, that was usually her job.

She was finally confortable beneath the white sheets, when a small amount of light flooded the room, as a tall figure entered. She watched as he stumbled around for a moment, and made his way over to the bed, placing the baby monitor on the table, peeling back the sheets, and climbing in. "I told you I was already comfortable in the other room," he said as he shuffled up beside her.

She felt his arm slip around her under the covers, and his warm breath on her neck as he leant forwards and kissed her. "We need to talk Chakotay," he rolled over and faced him. He nodded. "Tell me what you're thinking."

He looked at her through the darkness, "I'm thinking that what you're doing is a mistake," he said honestly.

Kathryn blinked in disbelief, not quite the answer that she had wanted. "Time will tell," she couldn't be sure herself if she was getting herself into the biggest mistake of her coureer or not, so deciding there was no point in arguing with his comment. "Are you angry?"

Chakotay thought for a moment, "I should be," he said, closing his eyes for a moment, "but no, not at you."

She let out a sigh, it wasn't relief, but more exhaustion, she'd hated keeping that secret from him for so long, especially when she'd ordered him to return to Earth with Yuna.

"I'm going to support you on anything that you do Kathryn, I always have, well, most of the time, and I always will," he said, kissing the top of her head.

"I don't deserve you," she choked at his words, and closed the short gap between them, feeling safe and complete in his embrace. "The other day," she said into his chest, her voice slightly muffled, "you said you wanted to go back to university..."

"When Yuna's older," he confirmed.

"How much older?"

He paused, "I guess in a year or so," he'd never really thought too deeply about it, just that it was something that he wanted to do. "I was thinking I could go back to my research on the rubber tree people, that we met back in the delta quadrant, and write my thesis on them."

"Would you have much more research to do?"

"A year or so's worth," he replied.

"Maybe you should enrole this year," she suggested.

He frowned, but she didn't see it, instead she felt him stiffen a little in her arms. "What about Yuna?"

Kathryn placed a hand on his chest, and kissed his bare collar bone, "the term doesn't start for over a month, and when it does, I'm sure we'll find a way to manage."

Closing his eyes he thought through his options, he had already lost so many years with the Maquis and on Voyager that the prospect of getting straight into a phd was exhillerating. But then, he'd just become a father, something that he'd always wanted to be, and the thought that Yuna would probably just end up being cared for by strangers didn't appeal to him. "No," he said at last, "I've waited this long, I can wait a little longer."

Sleep finally getting to her, she closed her eyes, "we'll talk about this in the morning," she said, moments before she slipped into a dream filled state.

She won in the end of course, as she always did, and part of him was glad for it. One call to Gretchen had settled it; she would baby sit, whilst Kathryn was out at work, and Chakotay at the university. Deciding that travelling each day with a baby all the way to Indianna and back wasn't the easiest of options, they agreed that they would move closer to Gretchen, and then commute their seperate ways from there.

Within a month they had moved out of the appartment, and were living in a small town, in a large house, with the picteresque garden, that Chakotay had often imagined his future to involve. For two weeks, life was perfect; Gretchen would arrive at eight, and they would leave for the nearest transport station ten minutes later. She would head for San Francisco, and he for Germany. Chakotay would always be back by four, and then Kathryn would return by six (most of the time).

Just when it seemed like nothing could go wrong, Kathryn arrived home late one evening and told him that she was going back to Cardassia, there was nothing that he could do.

End of chapter eight.


	9. Confrontation

Disclaimer: Paramount owns all.

Chapter nine: Confrontation.

Tom and B'Elanna sat in Chakotay's lounge some nine months after their return to Earth. B'Eanna was currently working with StarFleet to create a transwarp engine, and Tom was test flying the new ships that StarFleet was churning out. The three of them watched fondly as Miral and Yuna sat on the rug and played. Miral was six months older than her playmate, and spent most of the time either trying to push the wrong shapes through the wrong holes, or watching helplessly as Yuna lay on her belly, her arms and legs moving in some sort of swimming motion.

"They grow up so fast," B'Elanna smiled sweetly at the scene, Tom and Chakotay exchanged brief glances, as the half Klingon started to get all mushy on them.

"True," admitted Chakotay.

"It's what babies do, I'm afraid," Tom broke the overly mushy scene with one of his quips.

B'Elanna just nodded.

"So you two planning or any more children?" Chakotay looked across at the two of them, sitting on the sofa opposite himself.

Tom smiled, "probably one day," he shrugged.

His wife turned round to him, "I think two children's enough for me," and she gave her husband a sweet but sarcastic smile.

The two men just laughed, "are you trying to imply that I'm childish?" Tom started on a mock argument.

"Yes," she rolled her eyes, finishing the argument with only one word. "Have you heard that Sam's pregnant again?" she turned to Chakotay.

Chakotay nodded, "I got a message from her yesterday, she said she's expecting another girl."

"You know," said Tom thoughtfully (which wasn't always a good thing), "it would be nice for someone from the Voyager group to have a boy. I'm not saying that baby girls aren't any less adorable, but there's a serious misdistribution of gender going on, seeing as this is going to be the fourth Voyager girl."

Chakotay chuckled lightly, "I think it's the women trying to get back at us for out-numbering them 3 to 2 back on the ship."

"Ah the days," Tom said with a smile, "the borg attacks, the nebulas, the borg attacks, the quantumn singularities, and of course, the borg attacks."

B'Elanna slapped him playfully on the shoulder, "you're hilarious, you know that?"

He nodded, "but you love me all the same."

Suddenly, Yuna started crying, which sparked off a bought of crying from Miral. Chakotay and B'Elanna lept up from where they were sitting and tended to their daughters. After several minutes of trying to calm them both down, B'Elanna decided that the only way to calm Miral was to get her a chocolate button, and so left the two men alone in the room.

With the noise of Miral's crying coming from a distant area of the house, Yuna settled against Chakotay's chest, and he shared a short smile of relief with Tom.

Tom's smiled dropped. "Can I ask you something?"

"You want to ask me another thing?" Chakotay offered, kissing his daughter's head.

His friend smiled when he realised what he'd said, but he went on. "You know that night, at the house warming party; what were you and Seven doing in the garden?"

The older man looked momentarily confused, before a flush of anger came over him; it wasn't any of Tom's business. "What do you think we were doing?" it registered with the pilot that he was annoyed.

"From what it looked like," Tom said slowly, "I don't think that you were finished with Seven when you moved in with Kathryn.

Chakotay sucked in a deep breath, "it was the first time we'd seen each other since we'd broken up, well, the first time we'd had an oppertunity to talk. I thought she might have been upset by the fact that Kathryn had been pregnant at the time we started dating, and wanted to talk it through with her."

Tom nodded, "so nothing happened right?" he sounded hopeful.

There was a pause on Chakotay's part, and Tom started to feel a little ill. "It's not as bad as you think," Chakotay said calmly, "Seven kissed me, I pulled away, told her that nothing between us could ever happen again, and then you called me in."

B'Elanna suddenly appeared through the door, with a silent Miral on her hip. She frowned as the two men looked guiltily up at her when she entered, but didn't say anything; if it was anything important Tom would tell her about it later, she decided.

V

A month later

Kathryn ran her hands through his dark hair, as he lowered her onto the bed. He held himself above her and pulled her lips around his. His pants and shirt lay in a pile with her uniform jacket, and she allowed him to pull her undertop over her head. He pulled her bra strap a little way off her shoulder, as he kissed her neck, but decided to leave it until later, as he realised she was still wearing her StarFleet black pants.

He reached a hand down, and held her inner thigh as he continued to consume her neck with his mouth, relishing in the uncontrolled noises that escaped her mouth when he brushed over a certain area.

She closed her eyes and turned her head to one side to allow him better access to her neck, coming face to face with Chakotay the next time she opened them. Tears filled her eyes, "no, please," she pleaded.

At hearing her words for him to stop, he did so, and pulled himself away from her, propping himself up on his elbows, to see her tear filled eyes. He looked up at her bedside table, and seeing the problem, he reached out and placed the picture of the human man on its front. He turned his face back to her and lowered his lips, with the intention of reaching hers, but finding his decsent blocked by her soft and warm fingers.

She shook her head, "I'm sorry Trajiv, I can't do this."

He attempted to change her mind, by kissing her fingers, "you can," he said softly.

"He's my baby's father, and the man I love," she tried to explain, "I've hurt him so many times before; I can't do this to him."

The Cardassian hung his head for a moment, before raising it at again, and meeting her sharp blue eyes. "I love you," he confessed.

Tears started to fall down her face, and being unable to bear it, he rolled off from her. "I'm sorry," she said again.

"No," he sat up, and wearing only his underpants, walked over to where she'd left his clothes, "don't be," he said, picking up his pants, and pulling them on.

Kathryn reached out for the photo of Chakotay, it had been taken on a picnic they had taken in the park with their daughter. She sat up and ran her fingers over the still form, remembering how she had agognised over bringing a holo-image or a still picture of him with her. The holo-image had been most tempting because she knew she would be able to capture his laugh, but the movement within them was sometimes a little creepy, and so she'd settled for a still picture of him sitting and smiling.

She reached across once she'd put the photo down, and grabbed her shirt, pulling it over her head. She walked out to the main room of her appartment and saw him pulling his shoes back on, "I guess you'll be going back to Earth now," he said without looking up.

Folding her arms she nodded, "there's not much left for me to do here," she tried to sound professional, but her voice was straining, "I'll probably be back in a year or so, to sign the final papers."

He shrugged, "I don't suppose we'll see each other before then," he said, and straightend up.

She shook her head, biting her lip,

"I'll see you in a year or so," he said, and made his way out of her appartment.

Once he was gone, Kathryn leaned her back on the wall beside her, and sank slowly down to the ground. Trajiv had become a good friend in the months that they had been working together, and she had been aware of his feelings for her for some time. It was only after Seven had made a passing visit to her and 'accidentally' mentioned her encounter with Chakotay, that she had even started to consider Trajiv.

She had thought it would be easy, to sleep with Trajiv, and allow Chakotay to 'accidentally' find out about it. She had wanted some form of revenge on the man that she had repeatedly told that she loved, whilst the entire time he had been keeping such a secret from her. But at that moment when she had seen his face in the photo, she had found herself unable to go through with it, and in those fleeting moments afterwards when Trajiv had been reluctant to climb off from her, it suddenly dawned upon her what she had actually done. She had seduced a Cardassian.

Tears weren't enough to make her feel better, and so she retreated to the shower, where she stayed until her skin started to shrivel. Then she had packed a bag for her trip back to Earth the following day, and slept on the sofa, finding her bed strangly uncomfortable.

V

A few days later.

Chakotay chewed quietly on his food for a moment as he considered what she'd just told him, "okay," he'd said at last.

Kathryn frowned, "okay?" she questioned.

He nodded, reaching out and taking his glass of wine to his lips, gulping probably more than was neccessary, and returning the glass to the table. "Okay," he repeated for her confirmation.

She paused, "is that it?"

"Is what it?" he prodded the food on his plate with his fork, still refusing to meet her eyes.

"You're not angry, or anything?" she asked, not sure whether to be worried or angry by his reaction; didn't he care that she'd come treateningly close to sleeping with a Cardassian?

"Furious," he contradicted his calm and calculated tone. "But what do you want me to do Kathryn? If I knew he was on Earth, I would transport to his location and fight it out with him, or at the very least threaten him. But he's on Cardassia, so there's not much I can do about that."

He finally met her eyes, "I suppose if it would make you feel better, I could shout at you, call you a slut, and refuse to sleep in the same bed with you for a time, but what's the point? You'd just shout back at me, reminding me of the whole Seven affair, refusing to let me forget it, tell me that you were upset and just wanted to get back at me. Then I would say that I only dated Seven to get back at you. We'd fall out, and somewhere along the line Yuna would become neglected by one of us."

"So what's ignoring it solve?" she asked angrily.

Chakotay looked uncertain for a moment, "it means that we avoid saying things that we'll later regret."

"Like what? Like I wish you'd never found out about our baby?" she said vehnomously.

"That was the intention," he muttered under his breath, looking back down at his plate.

"Or that for a moment, I'd actually enjoyed kissing a Cardassian?" she continued to twist the knife.

He looked up sharply at her, and clenched his bottom jaw, and she instantly regretted trying to provoke a reaction out of him. With a great effort, he managed to avoid shouting at her, knowing that it would serve no great purpose, and only wake their sleeping baby girl. "If I didn't know that to Yuna you're nothing more than a familiar stranger, and that you'd never be able to handle her if she started crying, I would leave and stay in your appartment in San Francisco. I would suggest that you go and stay there, if I didn't know that Yuna needs to know her mother, so I'm going to make the suggestion that we sleep seperately for a while."

Kathryn swallowed hard, realising that she'd just shouted at him, when it should be him shouting at her. Then the thought of Seven entered her mind, and she was again fuming at the man opposite her. Suddenly she stood from the table and stormed up the stairs of the house towards their bedroom. For a moment Chakotay just sat there, not sure whether to follow or let her be. He decided to leave her for a few minutes first, he then went up to check on her.

"What do you think you're doing?" Chakotay stood at the door way, seeing clothes littering the floor, and Kathryn shoving clothes into a bag on the bed.

She turned around sharply, "you slept with her Chakotay!" she shouted, "how can I stay in the same house as you knowing that?"

"What?" he sounded startled, "with Seven?"

That question didn't improve her mood, and she continued to chuck things into the bag, "well how many have there been Chakotay?" she kept her back to him.

He came up behind her and grabbed her wrist harshly, pulling her round to face him, grabbing her other wrist and forcing her to look at him. "What the hell did she say to you Kathryn?"

Although she was crying, she still attempted to struggle in his grasp, but he was much stonger than her, and didn't seem to try too hard at keeping his grip on her. "She said that something had happened between the two of you at Tom's house warmning party, and that..." she broke of, being unable to continue as a sob escaped her lips.

"And what?" he demanded.

"And that," she took a deep breath, "that she had just had a miscarriage."

Chakotay's grip on her wrists loosened, with his suprise, and she pulled free with ease from his grasp. Seeing his shocked expression, she decided to continue packing, but just as she turned, Chakotay seemed to come to his senses, and grabbed her waist. "I never slept with her," he said, once he'd regained eye contact, "not on Voyager, not when we returned, and not at Tom and B'Elanna's house warming party; never!"

Kathryn looked searchingly into his eyes. "There's only been you," he went on, "I love you, I would never do anything to hurt you Kathryn!" He raised a hand and cupped her cheek in his palm, continuing in a softer tone, "she's playing us; at the party I tried to speak with her, to try and explain our situation, but she didn't or wouldn't understand, and tried to kiss me. I told her that there would never be anything between us. If she was pregnant, then it had nothing to do with me," he insisted.

She breathed heavily, she'd been angry for so many days, and suddenly she didn't feel anything. His thumb brushed over her lips, and she looked back into his eyes, almost overwhelmed by the love for her that she saw in them. Slowly, he leaned forwards and brushed his lips against hers, he'd forgiven her, and kissing him back she let go of the last shred of anger that she had been feeling towards him.

They slept in the same bed that night.

V

End of chapter nine.


	10. Reunion

Disclaimer: Paramount owns Voyager and her crew.

The Voyager reunion.

The first Voyager reunion was much like the main 'welcome home' celebration, in that it was a banquet. But this time, instead of being a reunion of different families, it was the reunion of the one large Voyager family.

Kathryn muttered something about sticking large cactus' in inappropriate places when she saw the swarm of press by the entrance, but she felt Chakotay's hand come down reassuringly to the small of her back and strode on confidently with Yuna held securely in her arms. With only yards to go to sneak in without being spotted, some young enthusiastic journalist turned around, "Admiral Janeway," he shouted, drawing attention from the rest of the media locusts.

"I'm sorry," she said with a smile, "no interviews today."

Her saying it didn't seem to make much difference, they all started asking questions simultaneously anyway. "Maybe you should just answer a few questions," he said into her ear, "to stop them hassling us this evening."

She turned round to him and nodded, he had a point, "okay," she grumbled. "Just a few questions," she announced in a voice the quietened them all quite quickly.

Chakotay stayed by her side, as someone shouted out the first question, "Admiral, could you please state your position on Cardassia joining the federation."

Inwardly she groaned, but outwardly she nodded, "I am currently helping to oversee that all the correct procedures are followed through with."

"Have you any plans to return to Cardassia?"

"Not for the next few months," she answered quickly, her attention quickly divided to another area of the ring that had formed around them.

"Richy Chambers of the Galactic Express," a guy stepped forwards, Kathryn gritted her teeth, but seemed to smile politely, "do you and Mr Chakotay have any plans to marry?"

She paused. "Maybe one day," Chakotay offered with a wide smile, which seemed to please the press. She briefly shot him a frown, but he just shrugged, and then she was distracted with another question.

Miral and Yuna sat side by side in their high chairs, Chakotay feeding his daughter, and Tom feeding his. B'Elanna turned her attention from the crowd of Admirals standing chatting at the far end, and back to the table, "well Kathryn seems to be enjoying herself," she noted.

"Who's she with?" Chakotay asked, not bothering to look up.

B'Elanna looked back round, "I'm not sure," she said slowly, "some Admiral, tall, sandy brown hair..."

"Oh," said Tom suddenly, leaving his daughter to eat her finger food, "that's Admiral Swayze," said Tom, showing off his superior knowledge of the Admirals within StarFleet.

"Oh yeah," Chakotay finally looked up, "Kathryn said they served aboard the Crusader together before Voyager, apparently they became quite good friends."

B'Elanna raised an eyebrow, "I'd keep an eye on her friends if I were you Chakotay," she said, noticing how frequently their former Captain would reach out and touch his upper arm.

Her old Maquis friend smiled to himself, "Kathryn and I have reached an understanding called trust B'E, it's a strange thing that means we're not constantly checking up on each other."

Tom near to choked on his melon, "sorry," he said in a hoarse voice, looking up at the table.

Harry reached across and patted his best friend on the back, it didn't do much good, but he thought he should at least do something. "So are the rumours true?" he asked Chakotay.

The older man shrugged, dipping the spoon back into the jar of pureed food, "which ones?"

"The ones that say you and the Admiral are planning to get married?" for some reason Harry still had to drop the rank, whilst everyone else was calling her Kathryn.

"I hope you mean Admiral Janeway," Chakotay looked sternly at the lieutenant, "and Kathryn Janeway for that matter," he added.

Harry pulled an impatient face, "so?"

"So I think it's something me and Kathryn should discuss before I start discussing it with other people," he replied, putting the matter to rest for that evening.

"So what positions did this Admiral Swayze and Kathryn take aboard the Crusader?" B'Elanna went back to the earlier topic before they slipped into an uncomfortable silence.

"Captain and Commander," Chakotay replied naturally.

Everyone looked around when Tom suddenly started to choke again on his food, this time they could all take a good guess as to why. "Hmm," she said thoughtfully, "and you say that they became good friends?"

Chakotay decided to ignore the sniggers coming from around the table. "You know, you can think what you like, but I'd prefer it if you didn't share any of your thoughts with me," he said with an edge of finality to his voice.

Kathryn spent the first half of the evening talking with various Admirals and so called 'honoured guests' at the banquet. Eventually she managed to break free of them, and slowly made her way around the room, catching up with her former crew, and meeting their families for the first time in some cases. Everyone was half way through desert when she finally made her way back towards where Chakotay was sitting.

When they had first arrived, B'Elanna, Tom, Miral and Harry, had been the only ones sitting at the table, but she was pleased to see, as she approached, that Tuvok and his wife had also made it, and the Doctor, and of course Seven. The oval table was large, and would happily have seated eight, but Tuvok's wife, Miral and Yuna, meant that extra chairs had been bought around. She was glad to see that Seven had stayed a respectable distance from Chakotay, and seemed content to be sitting beside the Doctor, with his arm around her.

"How perfect," she muttered under her breath, eventually reaching the table and finding that there weren't any seats left at the table, or for that matter near by.

Chakotay looked up, as if he sensed that she was close by, and gave her an almost relieved smile, then, noticing her dilemma, he placed Yuna (who had been sitting on his lap) back into her high chair, and summoned her forwards with his hand.

Everyone else turned around as they saw their former Captain stride up to the table, and stand behind Chakotay, placing her hand gently on his shoulder. She exchanged 'hellos' with all those that she hadn't yet seen that evening, and then proceeded to sit down on Chakotay's lap. For some reason, and to many of their own surprises, they didn't seem to find this action at all out of the ordinary, as if it was something that often would have happened on Voyager's bridge.

Moments later, the chatter around the table continued. Another half hour passed and eventually former crew members started to approach the table in a steady stream to say farewell to everyone, especially their old commanding officers. Seven and the Doctor were two of the first to leave the table, whilst everyone else stayed on for at least another half hour. But, eventually, as they slowly came to realise that they were the last ones left, they too, were forced to say goodbye, and left the large banquet hall.

It was eleven at night when Kathryn and Chakotay finally returned to her apartment in San Francisco, deciding to spend the night in the city, than to spend half an hour travelling back to Indiana. They entered through the doors, with Chakotay carrying their six month old sleeping baby against his chest. Kathryn immediately started to remove her Admiral's jacket, and chucked it on the floor. She kicked off her boots, and headed straight for the kitchen area, "coffee?" she called over her shoulder, before the door had even closed behind him.

"Sure," he replied loudly, "I'll just put Yuna to bed though."

Some minutes later when he entered the lounge, he saw her sitting with her feet up on the sofa and a mug of warm coffee in her hands. Her head was leant back on the arm rest of the sofa, and classical music played quietly in the back ground. "Comfy?" he asked with a grin starting to take over his face as he took the picture in.

She looked across at him briefly, before lying her head back. "My feet are sore, from walking around all evening, my shoulders are killing, and I have a head ache coming on. But other wise; I am quite comfy."

He made his way over to her and tapped her leg, she instinctively pulled her legs up to allow him to sit, he did so, picking up his coffee from the table in front. She lay her legs back across him, tilted her head up slightly, and took a sip of her drink. "I've lost count of how many times people asked me what our plans for the future are today," she broke the comfortable silence.

"I counted nine, from five different people," he commented, "but that's not including the reporters, and that's only me."

"And where are we headed?" she asked the inevitable question.

"Where ever you want to go," he replied safely, reaching across and starting to massage her bare feet.

The distraction worked for a moment or two, but she eventually pulled her feet away from him, and crossed her legs, turning to face him. "What do you think I want?"

Chakotay swallowed hard, "marriage?" it was less like an answer and more like another question.

"Is that what you want?"

He shrugged, "I can't see why not; we love each other, we already have a child together, we're already living together, and we're in this for the long term, we might as well make it a little more official."

She sighed, "maybe," she said almost to herself.

"You don't sound too convinced," he pointed out.

"Well you're not exactly making it a very appealing prospect Chakotay; marriage is supposed to be a big thing, and you're just making it sound like one of those things that 'we may as well have a go at'." She looked back at him expectantly.

"I'm sorry," he said with a short smile, putting his coffee back down on the table. Instead of sitting back up on the sofa, he slid onto the floor, on his knees, keeping his eyes carefully trained on hers. He shifted position slightly, so that he was only on one knee, and taking her hands in his smiled up at her. "Kathryn Janeway," he started, and she rolled her eyes at his sudden serious manner, "I love you, and intend to spend the rest of my life with you, so, would you therefore, do me the honour of being my wife?"

She looked at him for a moment, trying to decide if he was being a serious or not, his face told her that he was, and the smile dropped from her face. "And you're asking me now?" she sounded almost annoyed, "where's the candle lit dinner? The champagne? The roses?"

He looked across at the clock on the wall, "it's ten minutes to midnight Kathryn, if you say yes now, then we can become engaged exactly a year after Voyager emerged from the borg hub."

If she hadn't known that he was being serious she would have laughed at his comment; instead she found it less than amusing. "At least Justin had a ring, and Mark proposed shortly after sex, I'm not even drunk enough to find this even remotely romantic Chakotay."

He glanced over at the clock once more, "it will be a challenge to do in ten minutes, but we could have a go at all three if you want?"

Kathryn rolled her eyes, and he stood from the floor, "I'd better go to the replicater then," he explained, and loosened his grip on her hands, but found that they were still entwined together. He met her gaze and frowned, but she just smiled, pulling him towards her.

"I don't need any of that to know I want to marry you Chakotay," she said, as he sat back down beside her, "well, not yet anyway."

"So that's a yes?" he needed to be sure.

Looking over at the clock, she saw it was still before midnight. "Yes," she said, closing the gap between them, and kissing him on the lips. She broke their connection for a moment, as she climbed across the sofa, and straddled across his lap, brushing her lips against his again, this time much more passionately, and in a way that told him there was probably more to come.

End of chapter ten.


End file.
